Chronarchy

Jimmy's around more than usual, it seems

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 15:33:21 GMT

*snickers* Good interview with Jimmy, which has a wonderful quote:

Buffett, describing himself as "an old hippie" and "Southern radical," says now, "I'm an Obama person."

"Everybody knows my politics [he campaigned for Jimmy Carter and Al Gore and has played twice at Bill Clinton birthday parties]. But half my audience is Republicans — and that's OK. People should be communicating, which is the biggest factor to me."

He has been opposed to the war in Iraq since the beginning. "Anybody who makes policy in this country oughta have to walk by the Vietnam memorial on the way to work," Buffett says.

So why not vote for Vietnam vet John McCain? "I respect John McCain, but it's old stuff. John McCain is older than I am!"

"People should be communicating." Yep, that says it all, right there.

Optimism occurred well after the original depression

Wed, 09 Jul 2008 01:47:50 GMT

Three years ago, I was broken and beaten.

But there was a light in my darkness.

I never, ever thought that light would go out.

I found tonight that it had.

===

Originally, I was going to write only that.

As I type the entry, though, I find this needs to be tacked on:

But I know I will wait patiently, no matter how long it takes, to see this fire re-lit and receiving sacrifice again.

Getting back to divination

Tue, 08 Jul 2008 18:02:28 GMT

I stumbled across some of the mails I wrote just following the COoR discussions in late 2006, and I'm somewhat amused by my own attitude toward the whole process. The more I go back and take another look, the softer I become on a lot of it.

Anyway, that's another subject for another time.

I'm still in the process of completing the various divinations people asked me about. I've gotten through some of them, but not many at all. It turns out that my frustration with the process was hitting a boiling point (at least partially) because I was hitting the end of my "free-time" period before everything blew up.

As it stands, I'm still running pretty hard.

I've done a couple of divinations today, though, and those should be going out, too. I'm *trying* to do them in chronological order. We'll see how that goes.

Jimmy Buffett, on World Peace

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 19:55:32 GMT

A lot of people like to post lyrics to songs. I can't read them very well (long story, having to do with blunt-force trauma to the head), so I generally skip them.

As I was listening to the music today, though, an old Buffett piece came up. It's called "Today's Message," and you can find it on Feeding Frenzy. It's done, of course, in a sermon-style (with backups and the audience singing "hallelujah's" and "amen's" in the background). For reference, this album was released in 1990, so that gives some historical perspective. Here's my favourite section:

"And world peace? I've got an answer for world peace. We take the money that it'd cost us to build just one B-1 bomber, you know that one that doesn't work? We change it into five dollar bills. We put all of this money into bags and we fly over the Atlantic Ocean, past Europe (because they're getting their shit together anyway). We drop this money on the Russian people. All those little tiny pictures of Abraham Lincoln come tumblin' down out of the sky.

I want them to feel those sawbucks in their hands. You know how your money feels when you accidentally leave it in your blue jeans and you take it out and it's all warm and soft, oooh!

Well we let those Russian people hang on to that money for about a week and then we fly back over there. We fill our airplanes full of mail order catalogs from L.L. Bean. From up in Columbus, Sporty's Pilot Shop. And Victoria's Secret!

The Russian people have this money in their hand, the catalogs come down. They look at those pictures on the opening pages of the Victoria's Secret catalog. (Not back in the outdoor section: you know what I'm talking about, right?)

They got the money, they got the catalogs: they're going to get the idea. They send all the money back to us to buy the stuff. We have full employment. There's world peace, and the Russians have crotch-less underwear through the twenty-first century!"

Necromancy

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:31:12 GMT

Many of you know by now that Diablo III is coming out. Which means (of course) that I'll have to buy a new computer in order to run the damn thing.

But there's been a lot of talk about what's happening to various character classes. There's speculation that the Witch Doctor class has replaced the Necromancer (and speculation that this speculation is all bunk, of course). The Necromancer is, by far, my favourite character class in Diablo 2.

Anyway, to avoid writing an entire entry about a game that was announced less than a week ago, I'm going to just say what the point of this little post was about, anyway:

I'm thinking about writing an article on necromancy for the Samhain issue of Oak Leaves. I think it would fit nifty-like there.

Besides, I haven't been able to get anything into OL for a very long time. I feel somewhat guilty about that, actually.

Sulis and Taranis, a stolen wheel, and more bay leaves

Tue, 01 Jul 2008 16:02:16 GMT

After speaking with seamus_mcnasty about "resting on one's laurels" after the Pride Service (see yesterday's post), I opened up the Book of Three Cranes and read through our omens for the past few weeks/months. I've posted a couple of times in the last week over at 3cg_blog about omens, and since early May, we've seen an increased need to take stock of them. As I read them, there is a need to push the envelope some, to go further, and to retain the fire that makes this Grove dynamic and keeps us moving.

So, instead of our traditional invocations, Summer Solstice became "Storytime."

Generally, we don't have any issue with invocations getting the "point" across to our attendees, but we're also not out in so public a place where the folk have never heard of us before. So instead of going all "high church" on the folk who might stumble into our ritual that morning (and I do mean "stumble". . . ComFest is known for its beer), I opted to go "children's story time" on them.

The night before the ritual, I sat down with my books and started looking for information about Sulis (the sun) and Taranis (the thunderer). I make no bones about the fact that we don't have a lot of actual fact to go on regarding Gaulish divinities, and so I often feel free to borrow liberally from what's available in the IE world. That night, it was A. A. MacDonnell's Vedic Mythology that got my attention.

Under Surya's entry, the sun in the Vedas, I found a small note: There is a story about how Indra stole the wheel of the sun's chariot.

I took this and began to work forward.

Here is the story I told:

The Stolen Wheel

It is said that long ago, when even the gods were young, Taranis, the Thunderer, saw Sulis, the Sun, bathing at dawn.

Each morning, Sulis would rise from the cosmic waters at the edge of the world. As she rose from the waters, she would blush deeply, and only a glimpse of her could be seen as she ascended into her chariot. No man was allowed to look upon her, for she was young and beautiful, untouched.

Once she had mounted her chariot, whose wheel is the sun, she would ride all day, the wheel shining brightly as it turned along the path, until she returned once again to her bath in the cosmic waters, the aquae sulis.

The god Taranis had heard of her beauty, and though he knew that it was not allowed, he went one morning to see her bathe. Cloaked in his stormclouds to hide his form, he went down to the waters' edge. Taranis was not subtle, however, and Sulis refused to leave the waters.

"Who is there?" she called out.

Thinking quickly, he disguised his voice. "It is I, Epona's handmaiden, come to see your horses."

"But there is nothing wrong with my horses," Sulis responded, puzzled.

"My Lady fears one may be lame. Let me check them while you prepare for your journey."

Sulis agreed, knowing now that it was no man, but a maiden who had come to visit her. As Taranis hid beneath his cloak of clouds, Sulis exited the waters. Instantly, he was struck with lust, and plotted to see more of her.

"How are my horses?" Sulis asked.

"They are fine, my dear," answered Taranis. "Now, be on your way."

And so Taranis watched in awe as she passed by him, wondering how he might see her, so beautiful and naked, again. She mounted the chariot, flicked her reins, and disappeared behind the bright, shining sun wheel.

Taranis knew he must see her again. To do this, he left and flew to the west, intent on stealing the wheel of the sun, for he could not look upon her while the wheel shone so brightly.

He set his ambush far away, placing his clouds in the sky in the west, knowing that she could only travel a fixed path. He waited until the afternoon, and then began to approach the chariot of the sun.

He cast wide his cloak of clouds, racing forth in his own thundering chariot, obscuring the light of Sulis by covering the wheel. He stole the wheel from the axle and hid it deep within the folds of his cloak, laughing peels of thunder at his cleverness.

But Sulis was no weak woman. She was far-seeing and knew things beyond earth, sea and sky. She knew her path, though the cloak of clouds was dark, and she called on the horses to follow it. As the horses pulled, she dismounted the chariot and lifted the axle on her own, carrying it forth, becoming bright herself in the process. Taranis was once again blinded, though this time it was with a beauty born of strength unexpected.

When Taranis saw this, he was in awe—so beautiful a goddess, and yet so strong in her own right. Ashamed, he averted his eyes, admitted the spying, and replaced the wheel. He set Sulis gently on her chariot, and began to ride his away.

As Sulis became once again visible in the daylight sky, and and the clouds receded, Taranis offered one final apology: he reflected the inner light of Sulis' beauty, and brought us the rainbow, the most magnificent display of fire in water.

Children of the earth, this is the story of the Wheel of the Sun, how the Thunderer stole it, and the beauty of his apology to an underestimated woman.

Some aspects of the story are common themes: the cross-dressing (though it's very muted) of the Thunder God; the image of Dawn as a maiden, blushing just in case anyone sees her; the world as bounded by waters on all sides; and the creation of a rainbow as a sort of promise are all things you find just about everywhere. I sort of riffed on those themes, not quite sure where the story would go, and found myself writing it mostly without pause from start to finish, not quite knowing how it would end, myself.

As I wrote the story above, I found myself writing from deep within my heart. Particularly at the forefront of my mind were some of my own relationships with very strong, beautiful women, and the feeling that sometimes, others forget that there's just so much more to them than a beautiful face.

In the end, the story is one part ancient mythology, one part creativity, and one part mythologizing the women I love so deeply because of their fathomless inner strengths. I would name them now, but I don't particularly want to embarrass them (or leave any of them out!). The central action of Sulis carrying the chariot, and her beauty being in her strength of character and knowledge of what is right, as well as its unexpected but true nature, is the key to this story, in my mind.

I loved telling the story in ritual. Getting the "Monty Python-esque falsetto" down for Taranis' hand-maiden alter-ego was something I tried to practice, but it came out so much better *in* ritual than outside of it that I have to call it Awen.

I particularly like the fact that it really went so well, and flowed so nicely. And, I hope, we'll find more of this sort of thing in our rituals, at least from time to time. It is good to praise the Kindreds with creativity and joy in our hearts, and it is good to let the folk know who these Kindreds really are.

Oh, and yeah, we got great omens :)

Interfaith, Pride, and Bay Leaves

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 21:10:55 GMT

I have a feeling of inadequacy. Well, sort of. More to the point, I have a feeling that I have more to prove when I walk up onto a stage, behind a pulpit, or to the altar at an interfaith gathering than most anyone else there.

I remember looking around before the service at World AIDS Day and seeing my fellow clergypersons milling about, chatting, and generally being social. I was the only person in the room off in the corner working hard to nail down my part of the service. That was a frightening experience.

I felt at the time like I was the only person who hadn't studied enough to be confident in his words, or to speak clearly, or to convey his meaning. I felt like everyone else there was so darn comfortable with what they were doing, so well-practiced and rehearsed. I really felt like a child who has been asked to sing a silly song among adults. My words were even printed in the program, so there was no way I could ad-lib if I decided to let the moment take me. It was the most strictly ordered ritual I had ever participated in, and ever have since, with one exception recently.

Then the WAD service began, and I watched a couple of people speak. The first few speakers were polished, and I knew I had to nail my part. I walked forth and read it with conviction, fumbling one word out of about two hundred total (though I was apparently the only one who noticed), and spoke with as much force and courage as I could muster. I sat down, generally fretting over the fumbled word and started shaking like a leaf until I could meet seamus_mcnasty and shawneen_bear and ask them their opinion.

As I waited, though, I watched the other speakers. Some speakers were very good, while others were . . . not so good. Some turned their moment at the podium into pure commercialism, speaking more about their church than about their message. I recognized that day that I was not the only clergyperson or lay reader who experienced stage fright.

After the service, I received a number of compliments on my delivery and performance. It felt good to hear that, because I am never very sure of my own ability to properly represent Neo-Paganism or Druidry when I speak among persons of diverse faith.

Having a chance to actively work toward planning the Pride service from this past weekend, however, things were a bit different. Rather than being a "token non-Christian," I was fortunate to have another Pagan there, this one from Green Faerie Grove, which made two voices for Paganism in the midst of a small sea of majority religions. Instead of being shuffled into the service with a part already written that needed to be re-edited to be even a half-truth, I was given the opportunity to not only speak from the heart, but to speak the last words of the service.

I spent time again that morning, while others in the service spent time socializing or trying to organize photos, to work out what I wanted to say. I approached trees and placed my hand on them, feeling the rough bark. I knelt to the ground and felt the grass and the dirt. I listened as closely as I could to the Mother.

I watched the entire service. Some presenters were good, some alright. None were bad. But I still felt that same oppressive feeling: I have to represent, and I have to do it well. I listened to readings from the Bible and things written by Humanists. I heard Buddhist chants and music that was catchy and spirit-lifting. And here I was with no words in my head except a general awareness of the Earth Mother.

When it was my turn, I spoke something like this (this is as I remember it, and nowhere near entirely correct. . I'm hoping that a couple of revisions will make it truer to my words that day):

"I am Rev. Michael J Dangler, of Three Cranes Grove, ADF, a local Druid fellowship. We have always felt it was important to celebrate Pride, for we are all Children of the Earth Mother. Whether we believe were formed from clay and given life by the breath of a deity; made up of the elements of the periodic table; or born directly from the Mother herself, we all share our one Earth Mother. As we prepare to depart, we will ask for blessings from our Earth Mother this day. Thank you for coming to this service, and thank the organizers for holding it. It is our tradition, though you need not follow it, to kneel and touch the ground as we call out to the Earth."

Earth Mother, your children call out to you.
You uphold us as we move through life, with each step we take.
Let every step we take upon you today in pride and unity
Be a step toward justice, understanding, and love.

Let us follow the footsteps of our Ancestors
Who blazed trails long before us and fought for what was right.
Let us hear the blessings of the Nature Spirits
Who play among the trees and upon the wind.
And let us go forth with the strength of the Shining Ones
The deities we follow and love.

Earth Mother, mighty Kindreds,
Bless our steps this day, and uphold us even in adversity.

Children of the Earth,
Go in peace and blessings:
This service is ended.

seamus_mcnasty and I had a conversation later on about why I feel the way I do around interfaith events. A lot of it has to do with a strong desire to prove that Paganism is worth inviting into interfaith events: no matter how much I may dislike it, each time I step in front of a mixed crowd, I am representing our religion to everyone there. I am very aware of that fact, and my natural stage fright and disinclination to speak for any other person at all starts to take over. This is probably why I appear so "together" at these interfaith things: I'm so very aware of how much responsibility gets placed upon me, and how ill-prepared I often feel to live up to that level of responsibility.

In the end, seamus_mcnasty said something that I really took to heart: we in ADF (and Cranes in particular) are not people who are inclined to rest on our laurels. We are always looking to better ourselves, probably because we see just how far we have to go. Zeno's Frog is apt here, for no matter how far we have gone, there is still just a bit further to get.

I suppose that's why I spend my "free" time studying, and why I cut into things I really want to do for ADF: there's just so much further to go. I haven't even scratched the surface. . .

The comment about "resting on our laurels" reminded me of something more, too, and (I think) made our Sunday ritual better. But you'll have to wait until later for that story.

Good response!

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 13:39:43 GMT

Thanks to those who have offered questions for divination up to now: so far, six people have sent things in, which is about perfect.

I will get to them starting tonight, and will start sending out notes in order received as I finish them!

Thanks (and if you still want a divination but haven't sent questions, I'm still able to do that).

Divination anyone?

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 14:54:08 GMT

*grins*

What are LJ friends for, if not there to respond to a feeling of frustration with assertions of support and friendship?

So, I asked in my last entry, "Frustration", if folks needed divination done. Looks like some folk are in need of it.

I'm not worried about quantity: I need five more, at minimum (I got one last night), but it's not so much about filling the requirement (though last night I just wanted to hit the nine and be done) as it is about getting experience doing readings for others. So, feel free to drop me a line and let me know what I can do for you.

You can use the contact form on my website* or you can email me direct if you have my email addy (I don't want to post it here) if you'd like a reading. Here are the simple things to note in the request:

1) a couple of questions, particularly questions that lead into each other. I prefer non-yes/no questions, though I can sometimes work with a yes/no. Examples might be: "What's my relationship with Tim like now?" "How does sleeping with Tammy affect this?" "What if I sleep with Brutus, instead?"

2) any background you might want to offer me (note: I won't pass this on. . . divination work is confidential, so far as I'm concerned).

3) How in-depth you're hoping to get with this. I can do a simple rune spread, with one rune for each, or I can do three runes per question, or something in between. You can also just leave it up to my discretion.

4) A note that it's okay if I include this in my CTP materials, which (as you may know) get posted on my website. All identifying information is removed, and I write these things in such a way that there's really no way to know who asked the question.

I hope to get back to folk within about a week or two (though ComFest is this coming weekend, which is hell). I'll get back around to everyone, however.

I use runes pretty exclusively, but for _crow365__, I'll only use the Necronomicon Tarot.

* - Yes, it asks for measurements. . . It's an old joke, that I'll explain later. Fill it in however you like or leave it blank, but I get the best responses to that little question. . .

Frustration

Sat, 21 Jun 2008 21:20:16 GMT

Some days, I get frustrated with my progress through the ADF Clergy Training Program. It's hard (and it just gets harder as it goes on). I just stood up, my brain hurting from trying to manage answering a question, and walked around in a circle, not really knowing why I got up in the first place. There's a specter of fear in my mind telling me that I just can't answer them, and that I'm simply not good enough.

Right now, I'm stuck on Divination 2. There, I need to provide nine divinations I've done for others. Right now, I only have access to notes for three. I cannot find others (though I know I've done others).

So, if anyone needs any sort of divination work done, please let me know. It would aid me greatly to do some divination for you.

I'm within two questions of finishing Divination 2 and one question of finishing Trance 1. I have nearly all the information I need to finish the biggest question in Trance 2, as well, but actually doing it is really hard for me. It's so hard for me to see the end but to feel like I simply cannot get there. I feel like Zeno's frog.

Well, back to work: complaining about it doesn't make it finish itself. I really, really want to finish Trance 1 today, and get a solid start on Trance 2. Perseverance is the virtue of today.

(If I could choose two "moods" for this post, it would be "frustrated, hopeful." But, alas, I cannot.)

ComFest Volunteering

Wed, 18 Jun 2008 20:48:30 GMT

I know a few of my friends on LJ do volunteer work at ComFest.

For those who volunteer but do not credit that work toward an organization, it would be greatly appreciated if you could donate your volunteer hours to our Grove.

Simply write "Three Cranes Grove, ADF" in the "community organization" box.

Seriously, it would be very helpful to us as a Grove, and very helpful to me, personally.

You can sign up to volunteer at their site.

(Apparently, they are also requiring that you attend volunteer training prior to the festival itself, if you wish to volunteer.)

No nuclear reactors: Check.

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 15:15:59 GMT

Software is not designed, licensed or intended for use in the design, construction, operation or maintenance of any nuclear facility and Sun and its licensors disclaim any express or implied warranty of fitness for such uses.

It astounds me the things that people put in their license agreements sometimes. It also makes me wonder what event prompted the inclusion of such a phrase. . .

Wow, two posts about work in one day: It's like Christmas for people who want to know what I do for a living wage, except there's no baby Jesus involved.

Huh?

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 12:45:39 GMT

It is weird to see nearly a million dollars with my name on it.

That is all.

Of Army Men Who Cannot Stand

Thu, 05 Jun 2008 13:25:26 GMT

I have an army man who can't stand. He's not one of the cheap plastic army men (I have plenty of those, truth be told, most of whom cannot stand), but rather a little detailed reproduction soldier on a 1:32 scale.

And if something has a "scale," you know it's a quality reproduction.

Currently, he's leaning against a mobile anti-aircraft vehicle (from a war his grandfather probably fought in, rather than contemporary to his own equipment: I haven't bought an M1A1 yet for this infantry group). This is interesting, because he's posed to be running, not leaning. But it's either that or deal with him looking gut-shot instead of active.

And really, who wants a figurine of a First Marine Division soldier that looks like he's gut shot and lying on the ground? It's not like I have a Corpsman to pose next to him.

This is a minor issue, really, but one that bothers me for some reason. I could glue him down, or find some other creative way of securing him, but what I really want is for him to stand on his own.

It's odd, and it's childish, but hey: I may grow older, but I don't expect to ever grow up.

Separation, sacrality, and profanity

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 19:31:35 GMT

I've had an interesting article lying on my desk for a while (Oh, about three years, really), entitled "Markedness and Encompassment in Relation to Indo-European Cosmogony"^{[full citation at the end*]}. Silly me, I thought this was about marking off physical space in IE ritual.

Well, you can't judge an article by its title, I suppose.

Instead, this article is about how things are "marked off," not in a physical sense, but in a sense of elevating or lowering their status by stating that one thing is markedly different from another.

This is a damn tough article, and one I don't claim to really "get" yet, but as I was reading it during my lunch hour yesterday, I was interested by the notion that things that are separated from (or that separate themselves from) something that is encompassing are generally given a change in status.

Separation can mean one of four things:

That which is separated is given higher status
That which is separated is given lower status
That which is separated lowers the status of what it is separated from
That which is separated raises the status of what it is separated from

This, of course, is a very Marxist way of looking at ideas of religious separation, but also a very interesting one.

Also, separation accentuates difference: where once all things were encompassed, now certain things are clearly not. An example might be Greek Ge, who (as the earth) encompassed everything, until she gave birth to Uranus. Once she has done that, and created something that is "not Ge," then she has also become "not Uranus." After separation, there is an opportunity for superiority where no opportunity existed prior to this.

Bringing this all back to sacred space (you know, since that's what I thought this was going to be about, anyway), I think this is why I'm not pleased with boundaries and edges in ritual: I don't like the idea of elevating the Grove in terms of sacrality over the rest of the world. I sometimes feel like I'm stuck on repeat when I talk about the artificial constructions of "sacred and profane" in religion, and how damaging they can be to our simple enjoyment of the world as it exists. There's nothing wrong with attempting to perfect it (indeed, that's what ritual is: an attempt to perfect the cosmos), but there is something wrong with the concept that sacrality is preferable to profanity, at least to me.

* - Lyle, Emily. "Markedness and Encompassment in Relation to Indo-European Cosmogony." Perspectives on Indo-European Language, Culture, and Religion: Studies in Honour of Edgar C. Polome (Vol. 1) McLean, VA: Journal of Indo-European Studies. 1991

33% of bishops think 50% of priests suck? Huh?

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 20:56:42 GMT

On many levels, it is entertaining to me how interested I have become in the Church of England over the past year or so since I started reading the CartoonChurch blog by Dave Walker. I've graduated from his blog to a blog called the Chuch Times Blog, which features some of his artwork.

A recent story entitled "'Poor quality' of vicars alarms Church leaders" is based off a leaked, confidential report done by a division of the CoE that found that Bishops are worried about the standards they hold their priests to, as well as their continued enthusiasm for priestly duties. Once upon a time, this might have been an interesting news point or a blip on the screen for the CoE.

Of course, in today's blogging world where every jerk-priest has his or her own blog (says the jerk-priest you're reading), things are different.

The priests have reacted rather bitterly (imagine that) to being called "low quality" and insinuating that their motivations and temperament are not entirely level, and that their sermons just aren't up to snuff. You can read a sampling of their responses yourself. Fortunately, most seem to be waiting to actually see a copy of the report, rather than simply reacting.

I see the point of the study. As a very distantly (and somewhat disinterested) party, I know exactly what the Bishops wanted to see out of this: they were seeking constructive, honest criticism of their own methods of ordaining and promoting clergy.

One comment stood out in particular to me:

Dear Dave, I am the senior manager of a large firm. Currently, we are facing a few problems - rising costs, falling sales, poor morale, people leaving - that sort of thing. Recently I have decided most of my new staff are a bit rubbish. I have issued a management report pointing this out. What should I do next? PS I am ultimately responsible for staff appointments.

Indeed, those who are appointing and ordaining should be certain that they are ordaining at the quality that they wish to ordain. It is also vital that we don't necessarily look for people who are "perfect priests" when they're consecrated or ordained, just priests that we are confident will grow into the role (Gods know I'm still fumbling around in the dark half the time).

ADF's ordination process isn't actually "look-I-finished-this-study-program-now-when-do-I-get-consecrated?" though it often looks like that. Acceptance to the Clergy Training Program doesn't equal rights to become clergy, just the ability to become eligible. As I thought about this little hubbub over the CoE's own internal worries, I reflected on our own. I think that our Clergy Training Program goes a long way toward preparing people for clergy work, particularly as you advance through the second and third circles. Still, I find myself hoping that the Clergy Council Officers don't find themselves adding priests if they aren't sure that this person is capable and ready.

The CoE seems to be struggling even more than we are with the balance of providing support and the lack of qualified persons to provide that support (on the whole, I think we're actually doing pretty well). It's interesting to look at a four-hundred-plus-year-old institution and identify similar issues in our twenty-plus-year-old Org and ask, "Okay, how can we learn lessons from these guys?"

(And, of course, I can't help but wonder if my own consecration had issues of expectation or if those who consecrated me sometimes have doubts about me. But honestly, that thought isn't productive or important here. So this is just a note, in the spirit of openness.)

Colour the Grey, baby

Thu, 29 May 2008 12:54:01 GMT

I belong to a group of magicians called (variously) "N14" and "ColourTheGrey". The goals of the group are many (primarily having to do with magically advancing human rights and new hope without the fear of nuclear war, imminent environmental destruction and the false promise of wealth-in-the-future-brings-happiness), and there are still about 84 members of the email list (which saw several hundred messages per month during the WTO protests of a few years ago).

Today, the ADF Office received this little gem of spam:

Tired? The world is grey? Can't see sunshine?
Take this <spam link removed>
(Girlfriends not attached!)

I've always found spam interesting, really. Here, we have something that promises to open your eyes to colour and sunlight, to enliven you. But, in the end, it's up to you to go out and do something with it (otherwise the girlfriends, I suppose, *would* be attached).

It's the Chaote's truest dream, right there in a little spammy pill offering.

The dreams of N14 are good ones, beautiful things full of colour and life. I know that most people look at Chaos Magic as if it's all just gloom and tentacles, child-like chest-pounding and bird-flipping stick-it's. N14 is what I grew up on as a Chaote, though: it was my deepest magical experience.

Perhaps it's time I write of it more fully, rather than selfishly remembering the glow.

The world needs more Chaotes willing to go the extra mile.

Easing on down the Path of Study in ADF

Fri, 16 May 2008 15:10:28 GMT

Over the past weekend at Desert Magic, I was fortunate to sit around and banter about a variety of things with some great minds within ADF. And, because you all know me, no one will be surprised that we spoke about the current state of ADF's study programs.

Now that we have people working on Second Circle Clergy Training Program courses (and by Wellspring there will be at least one more person, with several more shortly after that), it's becoming more pressing to make sure that the courses are ready to go.

The CTP Outline shows how many classes need to be approved for Second Circle: four out of 12 are listed as "unwritten," though that word doesn't really indicate the fact of the matter.

There are completed requirement sets undergoing fine-tuning before presentation for three of those four, meaning that, really, only one class is still outstanding in the second circle of the CTP.

When Kirk and I sat down to revisit the Liturgist Guild Study Program last Sunday (and others joined us, notably Ceisiwr Serith, whose input was/is invaluable when it comes to liturgy), we hammered out five new courses, three of which should transfer directly into the Third Circle of the CTP as well (should the Clergy Council wish to go that route). We're also revisiting the structure of the original LGSP, which had a few issues. Fortunately, it won't affect current students at all.

It looks like only one course is left for the LGSP second Circle, and druidkirk is working hard on that one. We may have a lot of stuff done for our students by Summerland.

I'm excited to see where we can take this program, and where other programs will go as well.

Lectures, rites, and festivals . . .

Tue, 06 May 2008 16:50:08 GMT

I was fortunate enough to be asked to give a presentation on ADF and Discoridanism yesterday. This meant that I got to talk about two of my favourite things ever during my lunch hour. I was very pleased.

Dr. Urban asked me in to speak on these things to his class, which is doing an entire quarter on "Neo-Paganism, Witchcraft, and Satanism". The next class meeting is on Chaos Magic and Play, and I had a wonderful discussion with the class (well, I enjoyed it. . . I hope they did too. . .)

I'm spending the next few days working with the ADF Dedicant Path Documentation, trying to work up a monthly schedule for Grove Meetings. I'm also working on the outline for the next few Druid Moon rites, since I realized that as I head out to Desert Magic, I'm leaving shawneen_bear and tanrinia without much guidance, and because we're still feeling this out, I want to make sure that we get that guidance in place in the future.

This next rite is a lovely fire ritual, so I'm excited to see what they come up with.

It's odd, but with Desert Magic right around the corner (I literally leave from work tomorrow to go to the airport) I find myself most excited about Summerland coming up in August. . .

Prayer for Mothers

Thu, 01 May 2008 13:16:28 GMT

I spoke this prayer as I was doing a ritual the other night. I wanted to post it, too.

Let the light of a mother's love
   never diminish in a child's heart.
Let the light of a mother's love
   never diminish in a child's eyes.
Let the light of a mother's love
   never diminish in a child's memory.
Let nothing come between mother and child,
and let the child always know the mother.

Ghosti and comics

Wed, 30 Apr 2008 14:17:33 GMT

I often refer to the concept of *ghosti as being something like a close friendship where you and your friend go out to dinner, alternating who pays. Eventually, you both forget who bought the last meal, and one of you just sort of offers to pick up the check on the very basic understanding that it will really all even out in the end.

The relationship then sort of dissolves into a series of, "Whose turn is it?" questions followed by, "I don't care; I'll get it this time," answers; or else the meal becomes a pretext for inviting the other person out, saying, "Let's go out to eat, since it's my turn anyway," when both parties know that it's not actually that person's turn.

Recognition of relationship, followed by understanding that the relationship is deep enough that it was already even before the other person asked the question. That's really what ghosti is to me.

Well, for future reference, it may work like the above, but ghosti doesn't work like this.

Friends

Wed, 30 Apr 2008 03:21:07 GMT

Sometimes, the only thing that keeps us sane is a good friend.

When you find one, never let them go. Never fail to give them another chance. Never turn away from them when they need you.

Sail on, sailor.

Vision

Tue, 29 Apr 2008 21:21:42 GMT

"For I dipt into the future, far as human eye could see,
Saw the Vision of the world, and all the wonder that would be;"
-Alfred, Lord Tennyson, "Locksley Hall"

Four months ago, I was given the opportunity to take on a new role within my unit at Ohio State. Right now, the position is interim, as a new Chief Information Officer needs to be hired before the position I'm currently filling can be officially filled (this position reports directly to the CIO). A CIO has been selected, and has (it seems) accepted her new role with OSU, so I expect to know more about whether this position can become permanent in June or July.

Yesterday, I received a payraise to reflect new responsibilities. That was nice, but not at all what this entry is about. Instead, it's about Vision.

Vision is something I have come to think much about recently. Running a Grove required vision, and being the Grove Priest for 3CG seems to require it even more. This new job requires vision, and even the debate over whether to accept the new responsibilities or to go to Colorado involved much intense soul-searching and testing of possible options, with one solid and sure path finally appearing before me. My life has been consumed by vision in the past six months.

As I go into this job in particular, dealing with many different kinds of people and entities, I find that I'm developing vision almost like one would develop a muscle: though constant use, pushing its limits, and working hard to keep it in good working order.

I have found myself slowing down, taking stock, and deliberating a lot more with myself. My choices are certainly better than they used to be, and my understanding of the long-term effects of my actions is clearer and more defined. I have seen my actions bear more fruit than they have in the past, and understood how they work over time. I have watched tiny seeds of action and thought grow into strong young trees that have weathered fierce storms.

Vision has an interesting effect on the individual, as well: it makes them more confident, happier, and responsive. I've noticed it within myself, too. I know what I want, I know I will achieve it, and I know what actions I need to take to obtain that goal. I am more often achieving said goals, and I am reaching that achievement in manners that are far more concerned with virtue than previous means I have used.

Vision brings knowledge and joy. The joy it brings is as deep as the joy of ignorance, but the breadth of this vision-joy is wider than the broad earth that supports the mountains and nourishes the trees, not slim like the path of a rock dropped in the ocean of ignorance.

I don't consider myself "visionary," nor do I think of my self as always "acting with vision." But I do find myself seeing more, and interpreting what I see in better, more complete ways. It is like walking past a bright, spring green tree against a deep blue, empty sky and saying, "I have never seen those colours before in my life, but I know them well, and they are natural together."

"The true voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes; in seeing the universe through the eyes of another, one hundred others—in seeing the hundred universes that each of them sees."
-Marcel Proust (1871 - 1922), "Remembrance of Things Past"

Grove Blog, Books, and Pride

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 14:49:25 GMT

The new version of WordPress is a tad different, so I'm forgetting to actually "publish" the 3cg_blog posts after writing them on occasion. I caught it earlier this time than I did last time. Still, it just showed up on LJ.

I ordered a book the other day from Miami University of Ohio, called Ecstasy: Trance, Dance, and Transformation. I thought this would be a great resource for my Trance 2 work, figuring that a book like that would be wonderful for more information about trance.

Well, it's not about trance. Or dance. Or even transformation. It's about the damn drug ecstasy. Quite honestly, I can't figure out why anyone would want this particular book. The author is trying to be some sort of Tim Leary and not doing a very good job of it at all. I find myself shaking my fist at MUOhio and thinking smoldering thoughts in the direction of Oxford, as if it's somehow their fault.

Last Thursday, I attended a Pride organizational event. Three Cranes Grove, ADF, has been asked to help with the intertraditional service before Pride this year, and I'm very excited about this. As a result, I find myself with a dire need to accessorize my ritual gear (no, I'm not kidding at all). I was thinking that I need either a rainbow stole or perhaps a rainbow sash to replace my usual belt, but something with the ADF sigil on it. Anyone willing to give me a hand and help me by making it (or keying me into where I can get such a thing)?

I really enjoyed the Pride meeting, by the way. As I reflected back on the meeting, I wondered if I should have felt out of place, or if I had felt out of place. I really didn't, and I suspect that because there was a representative from Green Faerie Grove, I didn't feel as out of place as I had in the initial meetings I had during my last interfaith foray for World AIDS Day (where I was the only Pagan in the room and service, though my discomfort cleared up quickly in that setting). I've always really liked the Pride movement, but involvement isn't always easy for allies. I'm very happy that I've been offered this particular chance to show my support (and my Grove's support) for the movement.

It's clear to me that I'm going to have to get over my general discomfort with certain terms, though, particularly "queer," which is a term that I've known most cleary from its use on the playground during my primary education in Kentucky, really, so those connotations still stick in my head. I'm not sure that the word had passed my lips since at least 1999, when I last mentioned playing the game "smear the queer" on the playground to my girlfriend (who was appalled I had played it: I'm pretty sure I hadn't thought of the socio-political impacts of the game's name before that). This is an entirely different community with a very specialized vocabulary that I'm not at all used to, and I'm pretty darn sure that the vocabulary isn't agreed upon by the entire population.

Ah, well: it's an adventure, and one that I'm very eager to take part in.

Raw Numbers

Sun, 27 Apr 2008 23:50:19 GMT

Final numbers from ritual today:

Attendance: 78
Canned goods: 91
Number of speaking parts I had in ritual: 0

I love the way my Grove has grown. . .