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May 25th, 2009


09:49 pm - Wellspring 2009: Moving Forward
I have to say, as festival years go, this one seems to be the one with the best feelings and generally the best weather I've ever been involved with so far.

Coming off Wellspring now, I'm starting to see patterns: 1) This year's festivals are smaller, more intimate affairs. 2) The festivals have a different energy, one that has been better across the board. 3) I've seen things getting resolved instead of complicated. 4) Each festival is bringing us closer to resolution on particular items that are organization-wide.

I was happy to hear of a couple of particular patch-ups between people that occurred, actually, and to see some change in activity (though on Sunday night I realized that bad gossip may never go away. . . which is okay, since I created some good gossip of my own. . . ask about how I created electricity in my pants!).

The Annual Meeting was particularly good: it was nice to hear about all the things being done for ADF, as well as hearing solutions presented for issues that have been raised over and over. I look forward to completing several of the items I got to personally address, as well as many items others addressed.

Of course, it's clear to me that I simply haven't done enough with the SP's of ADF: that point is drilled back into me all the time (I actually felt that I wouldn't have anything to say when Raven asked for my report, but fortunately, he didn't ask for a report: instead, he allowed me to elaborate on changes that are in place and that will occur). As Jimmy relates from a bar stool in Captain Tony's Saloon: "There's still so much to be done." It's clear to me that we have a long way to go, no matter how visibly excited I may be about what we have accomplished.

The main rite on Sunday night was powerful and deep, possibly one of the most powerful I've ever been to. Right now, I'm ranking it around #3 in my ADF experience, with the Belenos Rite at Summerset 2005 as #1, and my Consecration as #2.

The best part, though, was the note I found on my windshield just before I left, addressed to me but really for the Cranes as a whole. It seems that we had made one member's experience with ADF brighter simply by being who we are: open, outgoing and hospitable. I'm so proud of my Grove and all we've done, and reading the note made my heart burst with pride.

I read the note to the Cranes at lunch when I caught up with them in Erie, PA. I think they were as touched as I was.

All that said, this year is a year to go to festivals: if you can manage it, please, please do yourself a favour and get to one. And if it's Summerland, so much the better :)
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] cheerful
Current Music: "Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season", - JB

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May 2nd, 2009


08:24 am - An understanding of death
It was a sort of odd feeling, in the wee hours of the Trillium morning [review], when I came to an understanding of death and what it meant to me.

I was writing my workshop, entitled, "An Awfully Big Adventure: Signposts on the Final Journey of Indo-European Souls," and was describing the things met along the way to the Otherworld: the two fires that separate the soul and the body, the various wells and waters, the ferryman who carries you across, the dog who devours, and the king of the dead himself. Over the past few months I've been dealing with death in various ways, considering my own views on it.

I probably ought to back up for a moment: I'm not much of one to dwell on afterlives. In general, my attitude has always been one of "we don't know, and won't until we get there." This has served me pretty well, honestly, for many years, and I have never thought of a coherent afterlife theory as being a requirement for leading a religious life. I had a (perhaps very Indo-European) view that it's not where we end up in the next life that matters, but how we act and what we do in this life. Sort of an expansion of the "it's not the destination, it's the journey" notion that folk often spout out.

Anyway, as I was finishing up the workshop, I found myself putting the pieces together in my head. Using Bruce Lincoln's Death, War and Sacrifice: Studies in Ideology and Practice, I discovered that I was coming to very different conclusions than Lincoln did about what happens after death: his theory was very pessimistic; mine turned out not to be.

In the end, Lincoln responds to the IE myth by saying that there is nothing after death at all: "the otherworld," he says, "[is] nothing more than the grave."

My own response is very different. Death, in an IE sense, really means something: escape from the greedy monster of old age, escape from worry and care, an opportunity to live forever in bliss or knowledge, and (perhaps most importantly) a chance to maintain the cosmos in an ultimate way: to be bound by the Rta or Xartus in the most physical and lasting way possible, by reversing the cycle of creation and thus maintaining the cosmos.

I took my cue for this from the Rgveda, of course. . . Hymn X.16, a hymn regarding the funeral.
May your eye go to the sun, your breath to the wind: go to the heaven and to the earth according to rule, or go to the Waters, if there it is ordained for you! Among the plants to take your place with your limbs!
In other words, when you die, the things that formed you at your creation are returned to the cosmos, to live forever within the cosmic order.

I summed this up some time ago in an ancestor prayer you may have seen, not knowing that I would return to it during this workshop, and find myself understanding death as a result of my writing it:
When you were born,
The earth became your body,
The stone became your bone,
The sea became your blood,
The sun became your eye,
The moon became your mind,
The wind became your breath.

When you passed to the Otherworld,
Your breath became the wind,
Your mind became the moon,
Your eye became the sun,
Your blood became the sea,
Your bone became the stone,
Your body became the earth.

When we were born, you did the same for us:
You called forth the earth and rocks;
The sea arose and the sun descended;
The moon shone down and the winds sang.
For those who come after, we shall do as you did for us
When we are gone, we shall do as you did before.
When I gave that workshop later in the day, I suspect a sense of my awe at the epiphany was pretty conspicuous, though I tried to hide it as best I could.

In many ways, I'm not ready to face the death of someone I dearly love, no matter how near that possibility may have just been for me, but I find myself now with a more complete toolkit for dealing with it when it does, inevitably, happen to me.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] surprised
Current Music: "Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season", - JB

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March 26th, 2009


04:29 pm - Dawn comes lightly into ritual. . .
I remember watching the dawn break on Mt. Olympus, far above Litichoro and the sea. As I stood in the gray light of early morning, watching the mists roll over the mountain, I understood a little better the presence of the dawn in the mind of the poet, and the presence of the divine on Mt. Olympus.

Truly, the blushing bride of the sun, the virgin innocent who blushes fiercely and beautiully when she is seen at her bath, the girl who comes quietly through your window in the morning and brushes her warm fingers across your face and chest and thighs. . . truly, she was there. . .
This past weekend, I had the privilege of doing a ritual attunement and Gate opening that had nothing to do with the regular Two Powers we often use in ritual, but rather had everything to do with Eos, the Greek dawn goddess. I've gotten a couple of compliments on the part I played in the rite, and so I thought I'd share a bit of my own vision of the dawn, who I (of course) associate with the Vedic Usas.

The most important thing to know is this: my own conception of dawn is greatly influenced by those Vedic poets who first spoke of the figure of Usas, rightly (I think) referred to as the most charming figure in descriptive religious lyrics. As a result, I think of the dawn as a beautiful girl on the verge of full-blown womanhood, young and innocent still, touched by neither man nor hardship; yet conscious enough of her body to acknowledge, however slightly, nakedness and vulnerability. I imagine that dawn, personified, is something like this:

In my mind's eye, when I view the dawn I am looking through a keyhole at a young woman bathing in her room, which is richly furnished in dark wood, draped in fabrics with warm hues of orange and red. She may sing to herself, or hum, as she slowly and joyously washes in the deep waters about her, the colours reflecting in the ripples where the waters meet her skin. At length, she rises from the bath, the waters dripping from her bosom in the many colours of the morning, and though she is alone she blushes a deep and soft blush, the colours radiating out from her skin. . . but this vision does not last for more than a the most fleeting of moments, for in a fluid motion she draws forth a cloth that covers her nakedness, walks swiftly across the room and throws open the window to the blinding light of the sun.

In another vision, I see the cool, grey mists of morning enter through my open window. Coming close on the heels of the mists, the dawn rests her fingers upon my window ledge, warming it and drawing colour to it. She then creeps over the sill, gazing down upon me in my slumber, and rests her hand upon my brow, lightly warming me with the warmth of her own touch. Her fingers trail across my face, brushing my hair behind my ear, touching my eyelids, and trailing across my lips and down my neck. Her fingers pass over my chest and stomach, warming them and drawing the first sigh of the morning from my body. She paints the room in fiery colours, drawing pinks, reds, and vibrant oranges across earth and sky. It is this gloriously painted heaven and earth that I view when I open my eyes and find her already gone, though I can still feel her touch and see the joy with which she has painted my world.

Heh. And people think Usas is a patron goddess of mine. Does that look like patronage to you?
 
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "One Particular Harbor", -JB

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February 25th, 2009


10:54 am - Gatekeepers, CTP work, and kicks in the ass. . .
A post by [info]Ceisiwr Serith has me thinking about Vedic gatekeepers today, particularly on the process of what makes one fire agni and another one pu? Is it Vac, and the word you use to refer to the fire that makes it what it is, or is it the intent held at the kindling of the flame?

I'm leaning a lot more toward the verbalization of the "good fire" than I am toward the internalization of the intent. Intent is all well and good for chaotes and fluff bunnies, but it doesn't actually cause reality shifts in ritual.

This, of course, has led me back to a conversation I had with [info]romandruid regarding a Vedic blessing rite. I gotta get that written.

At some point or another, I'll need to talk the Grove into doing a Vedic rite. . . for something. I suspect that means bringing it up at a meeting sometime.

Right now, I'm sure you've noticed that I'm pretty darn far behind on my CTP 2 goals. The week-and-a-half-long internet outage in January affected my ability to work on CTP stuff, and I just haven't caught up. I'm approaching a half-month overdue to finish the darn thing, and I just can't get back on track.

I need a kick in the ass. Then I'll probably need another one. Maybe a third as well. That's a good Druidic number, right?
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] disappointed
Current Music: "The Wino and I Know", -JB

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October 14th, 2008


04:41 pm - A new prayer: for obtaining an interviewed-for job
Last weekend, my parents met Maggie's parents for the first time.

Huh, that looks like it might almost be important. You know, like serious and stuff. And I don't want to give it short shrift, but by the same token, something far more important is going on in my life right now. And, of course, that something is a prayer.

I've been working on this prayer for obtaining a new job. While I'm unhappy with the meter, the format, and a bunch of other things, I really enjoy the sentiment:

Obtaining a Job Interviewed For

When Lugh came to the gate, he was challenged:
 "What art do you practice, what skill do you bring?"
Said Lugh, "A wright am I, a fixer of wheels."
 "A fixer of wheels we have, we need you not."

Said Lugh, "A smith am I, a worker of steel."
 "A worker of steel we have, we need you not."
Said Lugh, "A warrior am I, a champion famed."
 "A champion famed we have, we need you not."

Said Lugh, "A harper am I, a singer of tunes."
 "A singer of tunes we have, we need you not."
Said Lugh, "A hero am I, a man of great might."
 "A man of great might we have, we need you not."

Said Lugh, "A wizard am I, a sorcerous man."
 "A sorcerer we have, we need you not."
Said Lugh, "A leech am I, a knower of herbs."
 "A knower of herbs we have, we need you not."

Said Lugh, "A bearer am I, who carries the cup."
 "A cup bearer we have, we need you not."
Said Lugh, "A brazier I am, a worker of brass."
 "A worker of brass we have, we need you not."

Said Lugh, "Is there one who knows every art you need,
 One who is ideally fit for all things you want?"
Said the gatekeeper, "A man like that we have not,"
 And he heralded Lugh to the king, and brought him inside.

Lugh of the long arm, many skilled and deeply talented,
 Who interviewed at the door, and was granted the king's seat:
I raise my voice in praise to you and seek your favour.

 Let it be known that none other can do what I can.
 Let it be known that none other fits in this place.
 Let it be known that none other has all my skills.
 Let it be known that none other they have interviewed
   is better able to do all the tasks that are required.

Lugh, shining god with the long arm,
 This I pray to you.

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] stressed
Current Music: "Buttermilk Grove", -JB

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September 6th, 2008


07:19 pm - Nerthus prayer, Festival of the Midnight Flame
I was asked to make the Earth Mother offering tonight. They're really into Norse stuff up here, so I'm offering to Nerthus (I notice she's become popular in some Nordic circles).

Here's the prayer for tonight's rite:

On an island in the sea,
Within a sacred grove,
Your wagon awaits your ascension.

As the cows pull you forth,
War ends, swords are sheathed.
Quiet descends.

Nerthus, you move among us
Bathed in our joy for you.
Know our presence as we know yours.

Nerthus, accept our sacrifice.

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] relaxed
Current Music: "Lawyers, Guns and Money", -JB

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August 8th, 2008


05:04 pm - Is your god on The List?
There is something odd about this List of Entities that I stumbled upon. Perhaps it is the inclusion of Harpo Marx, Discordian Saint Second Class, as an entity. Usually, this would be good, except that I can't really stand lists like this, nor can I abide the great Saint Harpo being listed with (and I quote):

Gurid - an angel of the summer equinox angel.
I mean, really?

Look up your favourite god and/or goddess and see what they say about him or her!

Other gems?

  • Amon - Egyptian ram-headed god of life and reproduction. Later fused with sun god Ra becoming known as Apollo - God of healing poetry and music.
  • She - One of the Forgotten Ones. Invoked by the vultures atop the Pillars of the Abyss.
  • Nike - Greek goddess of victory. Bewinged, she was also a messenger goddess. She also has an overprinced brand of running shoes named after her.
Okay, so I can agree to that last one. . .

Deity lists are crazy popular online, part of the general buffet-style religion that's always been popular (as many in ADF like to say, there's nothing more Indo-European than stealing someone else's gods and saying you found them first). You'll find a lot of repeats and some consistently bad stuff (a personal favourite, about Esus was just found. . . "Esus, God of war, who may have been a tree god Celtic.")

I first stumbled onto this phenomenon when I came across David Owens' dictionary of gods and goddesses, which he allowed to be electronically duplicated online, called The Gods of Man: A Small Dictionary of Pagan Gods and Goddesses. when I initially ran across it, I was pretty freaked out. I mean, it's just so. . . superficial. (I've had the pleasure of chatting with him briefly online, and he's a good guy, and the list is pretty astounding, actually.)

I suppose there's about as much wrong with a superficial interest in the deities you worship as there is in a superficial interest in cheese (which is to say, not much, especially if you're lactose intolerant), but every time I run across these lists (almost always accidentally), I wonder who actually uses them.

And then I remember: I did. My superficial list was just written by D.J. Conway. Plus, it was David Owens' book that turned me onto Esus (due to its woefully bad description, but still).

So they serve their purposes, I guess. They get people interested. They build those first steps and get 'em out the door and into the bright light of Paganism.

So, in that spirit, I think I'll go invoke Lu Dong Bin, Nexhagus, and Freddie Krueger. Hey, they're on the list, man!
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] amused
Current Music: "Duke's on Sunday", -JB

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July 1st, 2008


11:58 am - Sulis and Taranis, a stolen wheel, and more bay leaves
After speaking with [info]seamus_mcnasty about "resting on one's laurels" after the Pride Service (see yesterday's post), I opened up the Book of Three Cranes and read through our omens for the past few weeks/months. I've posted a couple of times in the last week over at [info]3cg_blog about omens, and since early May, we've seen an increased need to take stock of them. As I read them, there is a need to push the envelope some, to go further, and to retain the fire that makes this Grove dynamic and keeps us moving.

So, instead of our traditional invocations, Summer Solstice became "Storytime."

Read about the process and sourcing )

Here is the story I told:
The Stolen Wheel


It is said that long ago, when even the gods were young, Taranis, the Thunderer, saw Sulis, the Sun, bathing at dawn.

Each morning, Sulis would rise from the cosmic waters at the edge of the world. As she rose from the waters, she would blush deeply, and only a glimpse of her could be seen as she ascended into her chariot. No man was allowed to look upon her, for she was young and beautiful, untouched.

Once she had mounted her chariot, whose wheel is the sun, she would ride all day, the wheel shining brightly as it turned along the path, until she returned once again to her bath in the cosmic waters, the aquae sulis.

The god Taranis had heard of her beauty, and though he knew that it was not allowed, he went one morning to see her bathe. Cloaked in his stormclouds to hide his form, he went down to the waters' edge. Taranis was not subtle, however, and Sulis refused to leave the waters.

"Who is there?" she called out.

Thinking quickly, he disguised his voice. "It is I, Epona's handmaiden, come to see your horses."

"But there is nothing wrong with my horses," Sulis responded, puzzled.

"My Lady fears one may be lame. Let me check them while you prepare for your journey."

Sulis agreed, knowing now that it was no man, but a maiden who had come to visit her. As Taranis hid beneath his cloak of clouds, Sulis exited the waters. Instantly, he was struck with lust, and plotted to see more of her.

"How are my horses?" Sulis asked.

"They are fine, my dear," answered Taranis. "Now, be on your way."

And so Taranis watched in awe as she passed by him, wondering how he might see her, so beautiful and naked, again. She mounted the chariot, flicked her reins, and disappeared behind the bright, shining sun wheel.

Taranis knew he must see her again. To do this, he left and flew to the west, intent on stealing the wheel of the sun, for he could not look upon her while the wheel shone so brightly.

He set his ambush far away, placing his clouds in the sky in the west, knowing that she could only travel a fixed path. He waited until the afternoon, and then began to approach the chariot of the sun.

He cast wide his cloak of clouds, racing forth in his own thundering chariot, obscuring the light of Sulis by covering the wheel. He stole the wheel from the axle and hid it deep within the folds of his cloak, laughing peels of thunder at his cleverness.

But Sulis was no weak woman. She was far-seeing and knew things beyond earth, sea and sky. She knew her path, though the cloak of clouds was dark, and she called on the horses to follow it. As the horses pulled, she dismounted the chariot and lifted the axle on her own, carrying it forth, becoming bright herself in the process. Taranis was once again blinded, though this time it was with a beauty born of strength unexpected.

When Taranis saw this, he was in awe—so beautiful a goddess, and yet so strong in her own right. Ashamed, he averted his eyes, admitted the spying, and replaced the wheel. He set Sulis gently on her chariot, and began to ride his away.

As Sulis became once again visible in the daylight sky, and and the clouds receded, Taranis offered one final apology: he reflected the inner light of Sulis' beauty, and brought us the rainbow, the most magnificent display of fire in water.

Children of the earth, this is the story of the Wheel of the Sun, how the Thunderer stole it, and the beauty of his apology to an underestimated woman.


Some aspects of the story are common themes: the cross-dressing (though it's very muted) of the Thunder God; the image of Dawn as a maiden, blushing just in case anyone sees her; the world as bounded by waters on all sides; and the creation of a rainbow as a sort of promise are all things you find just about everywhere. I sort of riffed on those themes, not quite sure where the story would go, and found myself writing it mostly without pause from start to finish, not quite knowing how it would end, myself.

As I wrote the story above, I found myself writing from deep within my heart. Particularly at the forefront of my mind were some of my own relationships with very strong, beautiful women, and the feeling that sometimes, others forget that there's just so much more to them than a beautiful face.

In the end, the story is one part ancient mythology, one part creativity, and one part mythologizing the women I love so deeply because of their fathomless inner strengths. I would name them now, but I don't particularly want to embarrass them (or leave any of them out!). The central action of Sulis carrying the chariot, and her beauty being in her strength of character and knowledge of what is right, as well as its unexpected but true nature, is the key to this story, in my mind.

I loved telling the story in ritual. Getting the "Monty Python-esque falsetto" down for Taranis' hand-maiden alter-ego was something I tried to practice, but it came out so much better *in* ritual than outside of it that I have to call it Awen.

I particularly like the fact that it really went so well, and flowed so nicely. And, I hope, we'll find more of this sort of thing in our rituals, at least from time to time. It is good to praise the Kindreds with creativity and joy in our hearts, and it is good to let the folk know who these Kindreds really are.

Oh, and yeah, we got great omens :)
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes", -JB

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June 4th, 2008


03:28 pm - Separation, sacrality, and profanity
I've had an interesting article lying on my desk for a while (Oh, about three years, really), entitled "Markedness and Encompassment in Relation to Indo-European Cosmogony"[full citation at the end*]. Silly me, I thought this was about marking off physical space in IE ritual.

Well, you can't judge an article by its title, I suppose.

Instead, this article is about how things are "marked off," not in a physical sense, but in a sense of elevating or lowering their status by stating that one thing is markedly different from another.

This is a damn tough article, and one I don't claim to really "get" yet, but as I was reading it during my lunch hour yesterday, I was interested by the notion that things that are separated from (or that separate themselves from) something that is encompassing are generally given a change in status.

Separation can mean one of four things:
  • That which is separated is given higher status
  • That which is separated is given lower status
  • That which is separated lowers the status of what it is separated from
  • That which is separated raises the status of what it is separated from
This, of course, is a very Marxist way of looking at ideas of religious separation, but also a very interesting one.

Also, separation accentuates difference: where once all things were encompassed, now certain things are clearly not. An example might be Greek Ge, who (as the earth) encompassed everything, until she gave birth to Uranus. Once she has done that, and created something that is "not Ge," then she has also become "not Uranus." After separation, there is an opportunity for superiority where no opportunity existed prior to this.

Bringing this all back to sacred space (you know, since that's what I thought this was going to be about, anyway), I think this is why I'm not pleased with boundaries and edges in ritual: I don't like the idea of elevating the Grove in terms of sacrality over the rest of the world. I sometimes feel like I'm stuck on repeat when I talk about the artificial constructions of "sacred and profane" in religion, and how damaging they can be to our simple enjoyment of the world as it exists. There's nothing wrong with attempting to perfect it (indeed, that's what ritual is: an attempt to perfect the cosmos), but there is something wrong with the concept that sacrality is preferable to profanity, at least to me.

* - Lyle, Emily. "Markedness and Encompassment in Relation to Indo-European Cosmogony." Perspectives on Indo-European Language, Culture, and Religion: Studies in Honour of Edgar C. Polome (Vol. 1) McLean, VA: Journal of Indo-European Studies. 1991

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] okay
Current Music: "Today's Message", -JB

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December 13th, 2007


04:13 pm - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007
Journal Entry 14

04/13/07
2:30 PM
Eleusis

It is here, according to myth, that the earth opened to swallow Persephone. Today, you see cars as you look out from the shadows, but now, in the spring while Greece is in full bloom among the ruins of Eleusis, the mystery reenacted here makes perfect sense.

The top of the cave is covered in cactus, and the flowers, small yellow ones that look like black-eyed susans without the domestic violence, spread around the floor. Of course, the metaphor in that last sentence is silly, but it's the best way to describe them. Considering this spot is where the traumatic rape of Persephone took place, it is rather refreshing to see a lack of black eyes and violence.

|
Plutonion, with [info]zylch and [info]viedansante | Plutonion sign and site description
This is, mythically, where the rape of Persephone took place.


On the balance, for such a violent event, Eleusis and this cave are now very peaceful. I'm listening to chirping birds, doves, and the breeze: these are the dominant sounds of this place, not the far distant breaks of trucks, motorcycles tearing through town, and cars honking at lazy landscapers.

|
Modern Eleusis viewed from the Plutonion | One of the pits next to the Plutonion


Yes, this place is beautiful, calming, and full of hope for the time ahead. It is spring.


| |
Lesbian Stones! | The Telesterion | Telesterion steps


Bonus!


The Temple of Artemis at Brauron

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: "Tampico Trauma", -JB

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December 12th, 2007


05:39 pm - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007
Journal Entry 13

04/13/07
Rhamnous
Mr. No Shoulders & the Temple of Nemesis

The temple of Nemisis is not far from the sea. The site is covered in graffiti, everything from initials to drawings that look like poor scrimshaw, but the temple is beautiful despite this. It is one of the few ruins one can climb on, probably because they hope that shoes and butts can eventually smooth out graffiti.

I made an offering here to Nemisis, asking that she be there for someone, should she be needed. But my larger offering went to Themis, because I know she is needed.

The temple of Themis is unmarked, so I made my best guess about which temple was hers. I asked her to accept this offering if it was her temple, and to accept its spirit if it was not. Themis is sorely needed.

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Temple of Nemesis | Temple of Themis
The two temples are next to each other


Down by the sea, I had a staring contest with Mr. No Shoulders, who I sat down next to for a short time. Mr. No Shoulders won, of course, as he always does. I don't know my Med. snakes, though, so I didn't know him from asp nor cornsnake, so Mr. No Shoulders and I just stared at each other, him enjoying the sun, and me enjoying the breeze from the see.

It was an amicable solution.


| |
Rhamnous' site map (Gk & Eng) | View to town from the Temples | The town from up on the hill

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Music: "Fins", -JB

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November 29th, 2007


11:11 am - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007
Journal Entry 12

04/12/07
11:15 PM
The House
Hot Water

Hot Water is. . . ineffible. For several mornings, we have spent our showers in achingly cold water, and for the past six days, I have managed exactly one hot shower.

My body feels cleaner, and my spirit as well. While I've managed to soap, wash my hair, and rinse off every day, it has always left me feeling dirty, even fresh from the shower.

Now, after my first warm shower since the morning after I arrived, I feel clean and (possibly) even attractive again. More importantly, I don't feel like I shouldn't approach some of these temples. I feel purified. [info]zylch said her shower was "The best shower I ever had that didn't involve sex!"

| |
The Roman Agora and Athens Acropolis
Temple of Hephestos beyond the altar of Ares | Turtle! | The Acropolis from near Hadrian's Library  


Today, I arrived at the temples of Ares, Athena Nike, the Olympian Zeus, and several others. I made offerings and enjoyed some meditative time on the Acropolis in Athens (where they have a strange rule that you cannot take "obscene pictures", which becomes extended to not allowing you to take photos that have people in them in the museum. In other words, you'd better not pose with your favourite statue.)


Detail from the hem of Athena's robe
Acropolis museum
Gigantomachy


I have been making small offerings of coins at most of these temples, but the offerings have been mainly for others. These are not really my deities, and my belief in them is complicated.

That's the interesting thing about our practice. I don't need to believe in a deity to do the proper or appropriate work for them. I really don't think that it would insult a god (though it seems to bug the shit out of the gods followers).

But it also gives me the chance to do work for others, work I couldn't do if it were belief that was more important than practice.

So I leave each site in Greece, knowing that my offering, though left for someone other than me, has been accepted. I always walk away feeling that I have done the proper thing, that I have taken the right action.


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Two views of Athens, and one "Way of Hermes" sign
From the Areopagus to the Agora | From the Acropolis to the sea | The Way of Hermes is over there


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Athenian War Museum: Thermopylae 1942 poster | WTFTentacles? | Athenian War Museum: coolest mace/club ever!
Note: the tentacle sticker was found on the Areopagus
But with a flask of whisky, a paint roller, and tentacles:
How can you really go wrong?

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "A Thousand Steps to Nowhere", -JB

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October 18th, 2007


09:07 am - Ritual Stress, and Unstressing
Yesterday, well: it was rough. Mostly, I had a rite that I really wanted to go well last night, but which I was really, really worried about. I'd spent a lot of time working through songs and trying to get them ready to go, and to learn them, only to end up forgetting melodies and underestimating the time needed to learn them.

Work has put me under more stress than usual, as well: I've been working my ass off for five solid weeks with no end in sight. Combine that with my usual pre-ritual anxiety and you have one basket-case of a priest.

It wasn't until I began to ritually pack the altar items we'd need that I finally started to calm down. There's something about going through the rite and all the stuff that's remarkably calming on me.

In the end, it turned out not to be the quality of our singing that was vitally important to Cantlos, our "ritual of songs" for this Druid Moon; it was the amusement and joy I saw on people's faces around the fire. Between forgotten words, failed reading of the lyrics, and our Grove's general "I-don't-sing" sentiment, the rite was full of songs and laughter and new jokes. Honestly, it was rather fun.

Props to the Grove for that processional, btw. Definite props.

I wouldn't have ever dared to do a ritual with that many songs and that little rehearsal as a public rite, but as a Grove rite, it was a lot more relaxed and fun. It may not have been as excellent as we could have made it, but we certainly learned a lot from it (like next Sept., we're going to need a meeting where all we do is rehearse songs for this ritual, and write new ones).

And boy, my Trance Journal got a hell of an entry on last night. I'm still not sure what to think of all that, but I see a lot of room for improvement on induction and focus.

We've a long way to go toward excellence with this particular rite, but I think we can manage it well. We have a year to look at it again, and the omens were not at all bad, though I think that the Powers were perhaps a bit confused by the shear number of songs we used, and possibly by the number of people making up songs on the fly, a la [info]druidkirk. The omens are speaking to me more strongly this morning.

A favourite part of the rite last night, though, was after the rite: sitting and singing/listening to karaoke with the Grove. I was there until 11:30 (when I figured our hosts might like to get some sleep. . .)

The next Druid Moon Rite, Samonios, is already in the formal planning stages now; I'll be chatting with the Grove tonight about what they'd like to do at the next Druid Moon. I suspect that removing the variable of *that many* songs will help a lot in the planning (and my subsequent stress). But I'm particularly looking forward to December's Druid Moon Rite, where we get to go back to doing initiations for a night.

That's something I really look forward to doing again.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] amused
Current Music: "What if the Hokey-Pokey is All It Really Is About?", -JB

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September 12th, 2007


01:28 pm - Midnight Flame Festival, 2007
On Thursday, I picked up [info]druidkirk from the airport. We were scheduled to be up in Michigan at the Midnight Flame Festival, hosted by Grove of the Midnight Sun and Grove of the Twilight Flame.

On Friday morning, we started driving north, running up US 23 and arriving about an hour before sunset. We were greeted warmly, and I was scolded for driving too fast in the campground.

The campground itself is amazing: there is cabin and tent camping, and the stars. . . my gods, they were beautiful. The area has almost no light pollution, and you can see deep into the Heavens and the shining night. The cabins were rather comfortable (I slept with [info]druidkirk and Skip), and the bath and toilet facilities were also quite nice. The weather was absolutely beautiful for the entire weekend, too: I couldn't have imagined better weather.

When I asked about the program, I found out that Skip, [info]druidkirk and I were the program, which amused me to no end. Fortunately, we more than managed to fill in all of Saturday with no dead time, really.


2/3 of the program


The first night was spent enjoying a roaring fire with a chimney log, which can be seen behind the cut )

We used this fire for our first night's ritual fire, as well, and Flip opened the Gates as he strode around it. You can watch the video behind the cut )

All day Saturday were workshops, with [info]druidkirk presenting on sacrifice, me presenting on prayer, and Skip doing his "Food and Drink in Indo-European Societies" class. We also worked in some pretty heavy trancework after Skip's presentation, doing the Bear Posture from Dr. Goodman's Where the Spirits Ride the Wind. Honestly, the workshop lineup ended up being quite well-done, with each one working in and dovetailing nicely with the rest of the workshops.

I was particularly happy with the way the trancework ended up working out. It was nice to sit down and talk with folk about the posture after we'd done it, and see the commonality of experience wasn't just a fluke with the last time I'd done this posture in a group.

On Saturday night, the Unity Ritual included a wonderful healing working. [info]druidkirk did the healing work, and I'm tasked with following it up as the moon begins to wax. It was also nifty to see how these two Norse Groves do ritual, which isn't something I've really had a solid opportunity to experience.

But probably the best part was meeting ADF members I'd never met before. Really, the theme of the festival really was one of Ghosti and hospitality. I also discovered that both Skip and [info]druidkirk are more outgoing than I am, but I knew that anyway. I met a lot of new people this past weekend, and I expect that I'll stay in general correspondence with a few. There's something about going to the outskirts of our American Groves that just can't be defined.

I hope that folk will come out for next year's Midnight Flame Festival. It was certainly worth the drive for me. A couple of people mentioned that it would have been great if folk from Shining Lakes had come up, and a few others were also hoping to draw some Wisconsin or Minnesota members over next year. I do hope that they come up.

Anyway, the festival was relaxing, intimate, and truly a joy to attend. I highly recommend this one to anyone who can go.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Livingston Saturday Night", -JB

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September 5th, 2007


09:30 am - Festival angst, on the horizon
At Summerland, Nora asked me if I'd do a workshop/ritual on my sunrise and sunset devotions for Desert Magic next year. I agreed, and also agreed to talk about Vedism in a workshop as well. I'm pretty sure that I can talk about Vedism for a while with no real issues.

The more I think about it, though, the more issues I have with the devotional aspect. The central problem, for me, is that my sunrise and sunset devotions are so amazingly simple and unimpressive that I'm almost embarrassed by how. . . "un-theatrical" they are.

Theatrics play a large role in group ritual. It's just the nature of the beast. They do not play a role in my own rituals, because there's no need to reinforce cosmology, intent, or anything else. I admit what might be described as a "deep fear" that someone standing outside my personal practice would find it weak, lacking imagination, and undeniably simplistic.

I think what I'm most afraid of is that I'll do my devotional in the morning and one of two things will happen:
  1. I'll bore folks out of their skull, or they won't have enough time to achieve a ritual mindset
  2. I'll plan a lot, but get so lost in my devotion to Usas or Ratri that I'll forget that there are other people there with me, and I'll either speak too quietly or personally to the deities for anyone to "follow along" into a ritual mindset
As an example of how fast my devotions go now, my entire sunrise devotional can be summed up like this:
  1. Strike a match
  2. Sing the Clergy Charm while lighting the candle(s)
  3. Pray a seven-line prayer to Usas.
  4. Stand "still" for a moment
  5. Put on my necklace
  6. extinguish the candle
It took me about six times as long to type that as it does to actually do the devotional, where the longest item, the prayer, clocks in at 15 seconds. (Ratri's prayer, in the evening, takes a total of 18 seconds, and is one line longer.) My average devotional lasts between 30 seconds and one minute.

Sure, some days I might add other prayers, such as my "Prayer to the Absent Epona," or a prayer to another deity, but these are actually fairly rare: most of my prayers to deities other than Usas (or Ratri at night) are done during regular ADF rites at my altar.

In the end, I am not sure how to do a sunrise or sunset devotional for a group of people who have no investment in Usas or Ratri. There are so many nuances in my own worship and adoration that even I do not understand them all.

Interestingly, as uncertain as I am about the entire concept of doing a group devotional, I'm not uncertain about the key aspect: I'll get up that morning and pour out my adoration to Usas, and I will pray fervently to Ratri that night. The twin daughters of heaven will be pleased, even if no one else is. And honestly, that's okay.

Then again, no one attends sunrise services at DMF anyway, so the point is probably moot.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] frustrated
Current Music: "Hula Girl at Heart", -JB

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August 20th, 2007


10:36 am - Pagan gods, rosaries, and gold coins!
Man, that Freyr guy is a no good cheat, isn't he?

Couple finds gold, puts cash in a box, builds an altar to "Fray", prays the rosary for nine days, loses everything.

Okay, so maybe it isn't Freyr's fault. It could be that this "Fray" character is just an impostor with a similar name. Or maybe Freyr doesn't like rosaries and so he laid the smite down on the guys who came up with the plan and turned their money into newspaper.

What really gets to me, I think, is that the con artists were. . . Hispanic, probably Columbians?

Rosaries and northern European gods and Columbians? I can see A relating to B, and B possibly relating to C, and A and C certainly relate, but as a triangle of relationships, well. . . I'm sort of at a loss.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] confused
Current Music: "Barefoot Children", -JB

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July 23rd, 2007


10:42 am - Three Cranes, Esus, and Tarvos
I've been working on further developing my connection with our Grove's namesake, Trigaranus (aka "Three Cranes", who we usually refer to in the singular as "Garanus" or "Crane"), within my own mind. If these 6th night rituals work out for the Grove, we'll talk about developing this a tad further as a Grove, too.

I started thinking about what names I could refer to each of the cranes as, and I started thinking about the Grove and what the Grove's strongest traits are.

I admit, my conception of Trigaranus is inextricably tied to my conception of the Grove.

As I was thinking about the Grove, though, I began to think about us in terms of the Nine Virtues of ADF, and I started thinking, "Which three virtues do we most exhibit?"

ADF's Nine Virtues are: Wisdom, Piety, Vision, Integrity, Perseverance, Courage, Moderation, Hospitality, and Fertility

Recent events were certainly on my mind, and I began to think about how our Grove is perceived inside and out. The virtue that stuck out most in my mind was Hospitality: we've seen a surge in growth recently, and we're becoming fairly well-known for providing hospitality (the joke has become that we are "Three Cranes Grove Home for Wayward Druids", which is great in our general opinion).

I thought about other virtues, and Integrity was the next to come to mind: not only in our words and actions, but relating back to the previous point of hospitality. We have a way of "integrating" folks into the whole here, and I'd like to see that continue and grow.

Vision was another obvious choice: I speak constantly about the Crane with "one foot on the land, one foot in the waters, and an eye constantly raised to the sky." I do that primarily to emphasize his tripartite nature as a creature of land, sea, and sky, but his eye to the sky could easily be interpreted as "looking into the future" while firmly "grounded in the present and past", if one wished to make a complicated explanation about it all (and this is religion: all explanations are complicated).

I then noticed that I had three functions with three cranes, and I was interested to see what I could do with the rest of the Nine Virtues (having six left over).

I started thinking about the parts of the myth that get no air play in our Grove: Esus and the Bull, Tarvos. I wanted to include them, as well, and so I set about giving them their own attributes from the Nine Virtues.

I ended up choosing the ones I did because I see Esus as a sort of "caretaker" to the tree: pruning it instead of cutting it down. This takes moderation, perseverance, and wisdom. I primarily see the bull, Tarvos, as a sacrificial bull, and thus connected it with religious action (piety), the continuance of cycles (fertility) and the courage bulls are renowned for.

It ended up looking something like this:

Esus, Tarvos Trigaranus, and ADF's Nine Virtues
Trigaranus Hospitality
Integrity
Vision
Esus Moderation
Perseverance
Wisdom
Tarvos Fertility
Courage
Piety

It's interesting to me to start, in earnest, taking the religion of the Gauls and really doing interpretive work off of it. It's also a bit scary, as I often don't quite know "how far is too far" yet, and the last thing I want to do is jump off the deep end and into fluff. The best I can do is avoid pretending that this stuff is "really the way it was" and say, "Well, if I were practicing Gaulish religion today, what on earth would I be doing?"

It's very interesting to re-imagine the cosmos. Very, very interesting.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: creative
Current Music: "Rancho Deluxe", -JB

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July 5th, 2007


10:12 am - Esus and Three Cranes
Last night, while listening to some drumming CD's, I started free-writing about Esus and the Three Cranes. I came up with the following random bit of sketching:

Three Cranes

Garanus
Trigaranus
Esus

Furious One
Passionate One¹
The Bull
Tarvos

The Willow

The Bill-Hook

The Pruning



¹ - From Chris Gwinn's derivation from PIE *eis-, which I like, though I think it's a bit fanciful.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] curious
Current Music: "Kick It In Second Wind", -JB

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June 27th, 2007


02:26 pm - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007
Journal Entry 10

04/11/07
2:37 PM
Acrocorinth
Where Sacred Prostitutes Held Court

High above the ruins and the modern city of Corinth, I sit in the precinct of Aphrotite's temple, looking out over the world so far below. There, the wind whipps by, running over two thousand years of ruins and blowing through my hair and tearing at my clothes.

I imagined coming here to seek the favours of this temple, of Aphrodite's famed sacred prostutites, and know that for this instutution to have sustained itself on this rock, so high and so inaccessible, it must truly have lived up to its legend, and even surpassed it.

The walk to the precinct was tewnty minutes, up 45° inclines, warn marble steps, and past hundreds of not-so-benign plants, all without a map or guide. I made most of it at a run.

On my way to the shrine, I was about 20 meters down the slope when I encountered a line of nubile young American girls processing down the path as I moved up it. As they paraded by, moving down the path I was struggling so hard to climb, I found myself already aware that Aphrodite still held court here. How else could I explain the exquisite line of twenty-somethings winding down the hill?



But to be here now, to see this view and sit among the stones, my imagination runs wild.
  • there, the priestesses meet their customers
  • there, they entertain them
  • there, they take their money
  • here, the pleasures of the flesh are combined with the sacred
And now, here, in this silence of the roaring wind, I can hear their sounds of pleasure.


Pics [info]zylch asked for
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View to the Northwest | View to the North | View of the Ithsmus   
To the north, directly across the water, is Perachora

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 View to the East | View to the South

Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] chipper
Current Music: "Son of a Son of a Sailor", -JB

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June 16th, 2007


06:18 pm - Gaulish Cultus
[info]eydimork posted in [info]gaulish_recon about A Call for Cult, and for those interested in Gaulish religion in any way, please swing over and read that post.

She's got a great idea going there. I'm still thinking about it, but I like the idea very much.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: [mood icon] impressed
Current Music: "The Wino and I Know", -JB

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