|
|
|
April 29th, 2008
05:19 pm - Vision
"For I dipt into the future, far as human eye could see,
Saw the Vision of the world, and all the wonder that would be;"
-Alfred, Lord Tennyson, "Locksley Hall"
 Four months ago, I was given the opportunity to take on a new role within my unit at Ohio State. Right now, the position is interim, as a new Chief Information Officer needs to be hired before the position I'm currently filling can be officially filled (this position reports directly to the CIO). A CIO has been selected, and has (it seems) accepted her new role with OSU, so I expect to know more about whether this position can become permanent in June or July.
Yesterday, I received a payraise to reflect new responsibilities. That was nice, but not at all what this entry is about. Instead, it's about Vision.
Vision is something I have come to think much about recently. Running a Grove required vision, and being the Grove Priest for 3CG seems to require it even more. This new job requires vision, and even the debate over whether to accept the new responsibilities or to go to Colorado involved much intense soul-searching and testing of possible options, with one solid and sure path finally appearing before me. My life has been consumed by vision in the past six months.
As I go into this job in particular, dealing with many different kinds of people and entities, I find that I'm developing vision almost like one would develop a muscle: though constant use, pushing its limits, and working hard to keep it in good working order.
I have found myself slowing down, taking stock, and deliberating a lot more with myself. My choices are certainly better than they used to be, and my understanding of the long-term effects of my actions is clearer and more defined. I have seen my actions bear more fruit than they have in the past, and understood how they work over time. I have watched tiny seeds of action and thought grow into strong young trees that have weathered fierce storms.
Vision has an interesting effect on the individual, as well: it makes them more confident, happier, and responsive. I've noticed it within myself, too. I know what I want, I know I will achieve it, and I know what actions I need to take to obtain that goal. I am more often achieving said goals, and I am reaching that achievement in manners that are far more concerned with virtue than previous means I have used.
Vision brings knowledge and joy. The joy it brings is as deep as the joy of ignorance, but the breadth of this vision-joy is wider than the broad earth that supports the mountains and nourishes the trees, not slim like the path of a rock dropped in the ocean of ignorance.
I don't consider myself "visionary," nor do I think of my self as always "acting with vision." But I do find myself seeing more, and interpreting what I see in better, more complete ways. It is like walking past a bright, spring green tree against a deep blue, empty sky and saying, "I have never seen those colours before in my life, but I know them well, and they are natural together."
"The true voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes; in seeing the universe through the eyes of another, one hundred others—in seeing the hundred universes that each of them sees."
-Marcel Proust (1871 - 1922), "Remembrance of Things Past"
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: "Wonder Why We Ever Go Home", -JB
|
January 8th, 2008
09:06 am - What has it gots in its pocketses?
This morning Usas followed her sister, gave way to Surya, and promised to return tomorrow. That is a small measure of warmth after last night.
This morning, I came across a post on CartoonChurch.Com, a blog I commonly visit because Dave's insight into "things clergy" is excellent, if Anglican rather than Pagan. The post is about "Things Clergy Carry," and reading through it, many of the suggestions are remarkably apt.
Myself, I carry matches and a tealight (we're a fire religion, after all), as well as my calendar and a pen. I wish I could carry a fire extinguisher, too (just because fire is sacred doesn't mean we have to be stupid about it). I also tend to carry around a jackknife, and keep a Swiss Army knife with a corkscrew in the car. I also carry some personal religious paraphernalia that's just for me, and (of course) my goddamned cell phone.
I'm re-thinking some of the things I keep in my glovebox and trunk now, though. While the last thing I need is more "stuff" in "places," it's good food for thought.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: "Truckstop Salvation", -JB
|
December 18th, 2007
04:08 pm - Priests in a People's Church - A Short Review
I recently picked up a copy of the book Priests in a People's Church from the library. Well, I technically picked it up from the Univeristy of Dayton, who loaned it to OSU, who I borrowed it from.
Anyway, I really, really like this book, despite the fact that it's written for priests in the Anglican communion. A number of the concepts expressed are certainly relevant to all clergy, regardless of path or tradition.
Here are some key concepts from the book (with some personalization):
- The Priest as Focus: the priest is the person the congregation most depends on. S/He also depends on them, but the congregation has the ability trust that the priest will always be there, while the priest cannot always rely on the congregation to be there. S/He has to do some things even when no one else wants to do them.
- Clergy as Center of the Vortex: at the center of many converging lines, the priest doesn't have the luxury of exiting the religious sphere. This has a double-meaning in ADF and Paganism, where clergy truly do stand at the Center.
- Clergy as Outsiders: No matter how integral the priest is, s/he is not part of the "normal" world. Priests are seen as "apart" from the normal community, despite the reliance the community has on them. There are feelings that the priest's place is not in the social setting, but rather in the Grove. Many priests find themselves very lonely very often. On top of this, the vision of a priest is different; their worldview changes with ordination/consecration. Seeing things differently is not only a spiritual thing, but a job requirement, too, as it takes real work to see multiple sides of an issue.
- Clergy as Exemplars of Virtue: Priests are held to a different standard. It's not conscious, and no priest will actively complain about it, but even in traditions without absolute morals (like our own), priests are expected to live up to a higher standard. In this sense, clergy ceases to be about personal development along a religious path, and is replaced with expectation of achievement of (near) perfection along that path.
- Priests are Easy Victims: It's easy to blame clergy for things, mostly because they take it so well and they often feel they have no recourse when a person becomes angry with them. They can't get angry, nor can they respond in kind, they feel, because they are aware of being always in the spotlight.
- Priesthood as Externally Defined: what a priest "does" has less to do with what s/he actually does than what people say/perceive s/he does. What does a priest do? Congregants often think they know exactly what the clergy is doing. Generally, they're wrong. But that simple fact doesn't change their impressions or expectations.
Of course, none of the above is me complaining about the state of things, and I'm not much of one to have been turned into a victim or held to a high standard all that often, but I have experience with each of these things, and I can see how these things can easily get out of control very, very quickly if the priest is not equipped to deal with them.
There are many other wonderful things in this book that can help priests (or perspective priests) of any tradition, including dealing with violence, narcissism, and even the media.
Really, if you get the chance to grab this one, about 80% of the book is directly pertinent to any sort of clergy, with the remaining 20% being applicable just to Anglican clergy (but still very well written).
And now, I'm off to return the book: it's 50¢ per day that it's late, and it was due yesterday!
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/smile.gif) cheerful
Current Music: "Today's Message", -JB
|
November 1st, 2007
09:09 am - Transcription Project
Something I've always wanted to do but never really had the time for is to get all the omens from all our rites posted so that folk could see them, which would help with their DP writeups.
I think that, if I can find the time this weekend, I'd like to get on that, and start transcribing the Book of Three Cranes over onto a page on our site. I'm not sure if I'd just make the omens public, or if I'd make the writeups public, or if I'd just make the whole thing "members-only" on the site.
But I've realized that each Grove Dedicant needs this information, anyway (as does anyone doing the DP who might attend our rituals), so why not make it available? I get enough questions (usually about one per ritual) within a week of the rite to know that it's something we need.
Plus, given our history with losing sign-in books (and then subsequently finding them after we've changed to a new book), it wouldn't be a bad idea to actively keep another copy.
So, that's my weekend project. Well, aside from continuing to fill in the 1 ft. x 1 ft. hole in my house. And watching the Buckeyes with ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) tesinth. And maybe getting a bit of sleep.
Heck, I haven't even had time to do my own Samhain rite yet. I'll be working off of last year's ritual, but I want to take the time to sit down and modify it, too.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Carnival World", -JB
|
June 18th, 2007
12:03 pm - Laziness is not an excuse.
viedansante made a post that sparked a memory today. As I was replying to her post, I realized it was turning into a full-blown entry, rather than a comment:
After being told for years that I was a lazy sonofabitch in grade school, I informed my fifth grade teacher that, "I dunno, I guess I'm just lazy," when I was asked why I didn't do my math homework.
She looked down at me, the most honest and real look I've ever gotten from anyone, and she said, "You are not lazy, and I never want to hear you say that again."
She was so wonderfully, amazingly right about it all. That particular statement actually changed my life.
Huizinga would call her a "spoilsport". He defines the spoilsport as one who "shatters the play world itself. by withdrawing from the game he reveals the relativity and fragility of the play-world." It would have been so easy for her to play the game, to say, "That might be true, but it's not an excuse," or, "Yes, you are: I'm failing you." She could have been the referee and enforced those rules on me. Instead, she looked at the game I'd been taught, called the whole thing bogus, and showed me that I was worth more than someone else's definition of who I am.
It's true what they say, that one teacher can truly change the world. This one certainly changed mine.
That conversation is the reason I get so darn offended when I'm called "Lazy." I know that years of hearing that said to me, over and over and over again, had caused me to internalize it. It's also why I don't tolerate others being called lazy. I was involved in a conversation not long ago where it was insinuated that I had called people lazy (for something as silly as not completing an optional training program), and to describe how much that hurt is virtually impossible, even though I know, rationally, that no offense was meant.
I found a deep and abiding sense of self-worth in my teacher's statement that day. Now, I pounce on that game any time I see it and hope to the gods that I can spoil it for anyone else who might be tempted to play it.
We are not lazy. None of us.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go take a nap in the sun.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: hopeful
Current Music: "The Great Filling Station Holdup", -JB
|
March 5th, 2007
02:36 pm - On passing when you're worried you can't. . .
 My Bro passed his CPA exam, and yours truly pulled a 97% in American Sign Language.
Most of my grade (indeed, 300 full points) I owe to tesinth. He sat around and recorded 26 takes, straight through, of me signing ten sentences for my first assessment.
Then he sat through 75 takes of me signing 10 sentences one at a time for the second one (stupid me, I thought it'd go faster if I did them like that).
I honestly didn't feel I could pass this class for a long time. After the second day, when our interpreters left us alone with our deaf teacher and a half-day of signing instruction under our belts, I felt certain I would fail this shindig.
I got a lot of amusingly "kick in the ass" sort of encouragement, some of which bordered on the line of "if you can't do this, you obviously suck at this Chaos Magic thing and don't deserve to call yourself one anymore."
Well, here's news: I didn't think about it like Chaos Magic at all. It was, unfortunately, not good advice for me, I found.
I thought about it like fencing.
( Fencing? You bet. )
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: thankful
Current Music: "No Woman No Cry", -JB
|
February 26th, 2007
10:36 am - Usas, Writing and Working
Yesterday, I sat at my computer. I'd gone to bed at gods-know-what hour after suffering through a major headache on Saturday, and woken up with suddenly nearly an enitre day to do two things:
- Practice my ASL
- Work on my book
The first thing I did was type up my ASL glossing for the test tesinth was going to help me record.
The second thing was sit down and move my book another step toward publication.
As I was writing a passage for the book, working on the "meat" of the book, which is chapter 6, "Deepening Your Practice," I found myself writing about sunrise rituals. I remembered the first time I had seen the sun rise, back when I was almost 19 years old, and thought about the effect it had on me.
Then I thought about my most recent actions regarding the sunrise, I realized that I had experienced the expanding days with a particular joy: Soon, I would be able to hold sunrise and sunset rituals again. Just today, it seems, the dawn comes at a time when I can rise before her, prepare the sacrifices, do my ritual, and still make it to work on time. I have truly missed this, and tomorrow morning I will re-start my dawn/sunset rituals.
I found myself, entirely to my surprise, suddenly writing about Usas, dancing on the rim of the world. She is the last of all dawns that came before her, and the first of all dawns that will come after her. She is that beautiful maiden whose bosom, rising from the waters of her bath, drenches the sky in the hues of morning. She opens the gates of heaven, the ways for Surya, the sun. She is greeted by those who make generous sacrifices and ignored by those who do not. It is almost as if the sacrifice can afford you a glimpse of her beauty, and it will forever affect you.
It strikes me as odd, that Usas and Ratri, so tied to perfect order, should call so strongly to me. Usas holds my heart, but there is a love for Ratri, too, and her prayers come at sunset. My facination with Usas might come from my stint as Surya at Walking With Fire in 2005, but it's hard to say. I suspect that it has more to do with the fact that I have done these dawn rituals, that I've seen Usas first hand, and every morning I fell in love with her again.
I agree with MacDonell, that there truly is no other figure in literature nor myth who is as charming or described with more deep love and emotion as Usas. I smile when I see the dawn, that knowing smile a lover gives to his beloved. I know how the poets felt when they saw her, and I know what they thought when they thought of her. I don't feel as if I can speak and do justice to her, and the things I write are never as beautiful as she.
Praised through my prayer are you who should be lauded. You have increased our wealth, Usas who loves us.
Goddesses, may we win, by your good favour, wealth to be told by hundreds and thousands.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: rejuvenated
Current Music: "Please Take Your Drunken 15 Year-old Girlfriend Home", -JB
|
February 15th, 2007
10:09 am - Driving in winter and a happy, lonely valentine
I admit to being somewhat sore from the shoveling of ice off my driveway. . . but these things happen in winter.
You know the other thing that happens in winters in Ohio?
Yep, that's right: Snow gets on the roads.
See, it's this weird thing: when the temperature drops, precipitation that is normally liquid turns into beautiful little crystals of white death!
Oh, you have options: - panic and call in to work or school as "unable to leave your residence"
- thank God and Country and the Consumer Need For Shit You Can't Afford To Fill With Gas Anyway (in that order) and go out and own the roads by throwing caution to the wind and knowing that everyone else's car is half the size of yours (thus, you win)
- panic but go out on the roads anyway and drive 5 mph through roads that are well traveled, plowed, and salted
- drive, no matter what kind of car you're in, like you're the only car on the road
- drive as if conditions are normal
I'm positive there are more ways to deal with the situation, but here in Columbus, we seem to ignore those other ways.
Anyway, as I was driving home on Tuesday through the ice that was covering the downy snow, I realized that I was thankful that my first driving experiences came in snow and fog in Chicago traffic.
Indeed, the conditions didn't frighten me at all. As I moved my car from "drive" to "intermediate" and occasionally "low", I smiled to myself. "I'm thankful I know how to drive in this," I thought. I didn't experience a single slip or moment of low traction.
Now, I'm certainly not going to say I'm a perfect winter driver. I've had the occasional bumping of another car when I misjudged ice and speed. But I've avoided major accidents thus far (the worst that has come of those "bumps" is a bit of paint transfer), and the frozen white death from the sky doesn't inspire fear in me. I think that this mostly has to do with the fact that I'm not dumb enough to feel invincible on the roads, and I'm familiar enough with the nuances of driving in snow and on ice to respect but not fear it.
I'm still astounded that an inch of snow can cause major cities to roll over and die (Atlanta is a good example), and that even a foot of snow is somehow unmanageable.
But honestly, the best Valentine's Day ever? Yesterday, when OSU called off its classes and I didn't have to go to work. I slept until noon, got up, and shoveled the driveway. I pushed Tina's car out onto the street. I baked cookies (thanks to suicidekttn) and did homework. Then I wrote a number of prayers, and did several workings that I needed to do for others. In all, it was great. And I didn't see a soul aside from Tina and the occasional other neighbor out cleaning his driveway.
This cat could use more days like that.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Train to Dixieland", -JB
|
February 13th, 2007
01:47 pm - High School Reunions
I've been given the option, recently, to go to my Ten Year High School Reunion this year. This is that chance to point and laugh at people who were popular and whose lives turned out to be shit. Or so that's what everyone is telling me.
Thing is, there are two particular issues at play with whether I'm willing to shell out $70 to go see some people that haven't bothered to talk to me in ten years.
- There are some people I'd really like to see again, maybe catch up with, and maybe say, "Hey, look: I don't mind that you stopped talking to me the day we graduated."
- There is someone in particular that I have no desire to ever see again.
Yes, in this case, I'm actually shallow enough and bitter enough to say, "I'm sorry, but seeing everyone again just isn't really worth running into this person."
For the most part, much of my high school life was left behind as soon as I went to a college that no one else in my (really freakin' huge) class of 787 other students went to. Sure, I visited, and I occasionally hung out with friends from high school still, but for the most part, I went a very separate way from most of them.
Every now and again, I'll hear back from them, or I'll get information via word-of-mouth. And for the most part, I'm fine with that: I don't ask after folks because I don't feel it's an important thing to do, socially.
But part of me wants to see a few of these people in person.
The other part of me, though, doesn't want to see this other, single individual again. Ever. I imagine that part of it is fear, part of it is general pain, and part of it is just bitterness. But I have thought about it, examined myself and my feelings, and come to the conclusion that this isn't something I'm ready to deal with.
I suppose there are options: I could ignore this person if they tried to speak to me, I could politely tell them to "fuck off", or I could just shout obscenities at them until they leave me alone. But as hurt and fearful as I am of this person, I also don't really want to hurt this person back in any way. I simply wish that this person and I never share the same general locative and temporal space again.
The odd thing is, this is the only person I would ever have this sort of problem with. Finding the root of it is hard, because it's an experience so unlike anything else I have ever known: it does not make sense to me that I should feel like this. Heck, there was a kid named Chad in my Latin class at DCHS who I couldn't stand, who poked fun at me, who knew how to push my buttons. . . And I wouldn't mind seeing him again. Heck, the kid who tried to beat me up in sixth grade, Jeremy, would be someone I could deal with on a personal level now. But this person is different. Very different.
And I suspect that this single individual will keep me away from those old high school friends for the rest of my life.
And in the end, I'm so not fine with that person that I'm fine with missing every reunion until I die.
Talk about weird.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/thinking.gif) contemplative
Current Music: "Creola", -JB
|
January 10th, 2007
02:20 pm - The Natural Wet-Willy
Nature gave me a damn wet-willy last night.
Walking out to PSA through the cold, I was just thinking how nice global warming has been and how much global cooling sucks, when a really big snowflake landed in my ear and started melting.
"Damnit," I shouted into the cold night air, "Can't those ice-caps melt any faster?"
I figure that if she's gonna be a bitch to me, I ought to be one right back.
I'm exceedingly busy right now, between work, class, and lots of other responsibilities. And I'm expecting that it's just going to get harder as time goes on, at least for this quarter. Some of you may not see me socially until late March at this point, and LJ is falling further down the list of priorities.
So if you need me, call or email. I respond much better to those two things.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Growing Older But Not Up", -JB
|
January 4th, 2007
03:59 pm - Steps to a better life:
- Step 1: Learn ASL for "Can I buy you a cup of coffee?"
- Step 2: ?
- Step 3: Profit!
Today's excursion into entirely different modes of experiencing communication was nigh disastrous.
Thankfully, there was a cute girl sitting next to me who kinda knew what she was doing, and was willing to help me out.
I'm in over my head with the ASL stuff, but the Chaote is kicking in.
If that little bastard weren't so rusty at existence, I might stand a chance at acing this course.
As it stands, I walked out repeating, "I will not be frightened by the fact that I can't keep up with a girl on the first day of class. I will not give in to frustration. I am not here for me. I am here for my Grove, ADF, and my co-workers. If no one sees me for ten weeks, they can deal with that."
And in a little voice at the back of my head, I was repeating something deeper and more ingrained:
I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain. Then I turned around and looked back at Mendenhall Lab and the girl caught my eye and waved. And damnit, there I was feeling in-over-my-head again.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Sail On Sailor", -JB
|
09:50 am - A case of nostalgia
So this customer has the last name "Case". I've been processing the same 100W since 2 PM yesterday (it's a bit complicated), and I've worked on this "Case" person several times: written the name, looked up the name, read the name, checked information about the name. . . All stuff I have to do in order to properly process the payment.
But for some reason, it's distracting. I can't get a girl out of my mind, one I knew a long time ago (almost a decade now). This customer, "Case," is why I can't forget her today, and why I am having trouble processing the tickets associated with the name, and why I'm writing this entry now (so that hopefully, I can get moving again on the actual work).
I met the girl at a fencing meet at Notre Dame my freshman year. She was from Case Western Reserve University (you see now the connection), and she was just an amazing girl.
I try and keep in touch with her, but it's hard for me. She's in Denver now, or was last I heard. I have a couple of letters from her and occasionally wonder if she has a couple of letters from me.
I kinda miss talking to her.
I wonder if my most recent address for her is still any good?
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: "Something So Feminine About a Mandolin", -JB
|
January 3rd, 2007
10:21 am - Ah, LJ: a miscellany
Today, I am happy that I wrote that stationary about how we don't allow people to "Test Out" of the DP based on previous experience and "advanced age". Especially when that experience appears to come in the form of spirits telling you to drop loaves of bread down wells and the advanced age in question is 47.
I had the day from hell at work yesterday, and expect today will be no different.
I have a fear in the pit of my stomach about classes starting tomorrow. . . and I have to go pay my tuition.
I am feeling like I have somehow been disastrously out of touch with ADF's membership for the past three or four years.
I want to watch a bad movie in a good theater with some friends. Hell, I'll settle for a good movie, if anyone knows one. Anyone up for Pick of Destiny late on Thursday night? There's a 10 PM showing.
Please, Notre Dame, suck as badly as you know you do! LSU better not embarrass their conference like Michigan did.
I will send the article on miscarriages I wrote to those who wanted it.
I have come to the conclusion that I am exhausted.
And I'm never going to manage to read everyone's entries from the past couple of days if I don't get to it very, very soon. Promise I will.
I have this sinking feeling that there are about 3 full pages of people posting drunken "Happy New Year" sentiments or rants that I'm going to have to dig through to get back to Dec. 29, when I last read my friend's list.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: awake
Current Music: "Kick It In Second Wind", -JB
|
December 29th, 2006
08:48 pm - finished
I now have all articles that I consider relevant to Neo-Pagan Clergy downloaded from the past 6 years of The Clergy Journal's publication archive.
Yow, that's a lot :)
The Oak Leaves deadline is up in a couple days (01/01/07), so if you have something to submit, please do.
So far, for this issue, I have submitted - a Hittite rite of offering,
- my amusing little Nine Virtues of Hogwash (which'll probably piss someone off)
- an article on miscarriages
I have a few more things I want to write, but so far so good.
(I really, really want to finish my article about "ADF Liturgy As A Mexican Burrito")
Today, I was struck by a few things I read in The Clergy Journal. Food for thought over the weekend.
I'm about a week behind on personal email. . . sorry about that. I didn't actually check mail over Christmas. Will get back to it when I get a chance. As it stands, there's too much to do, and the four days I had off work weren't anywhere near enough, between my constant motion and a fight over a pie plate.
Two weeks ago, I used my status as clergy for the first time. I'm still a little sick over it, but it's what I signed up for, and I wouldn't have it any other way, in a weird way :)
So, with that in mind, I'm going to try and hide for a while. I'm starting classes again next quarter, and for the first time ever, I'm terrified of them.
It's a lot of work ahead. A whole lot.
Maybe I'll write Christmas cards this weekend?
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Music: "Fins", -JB
|
December 7th, 2006
01:02 pm - Paying the dues and reading about infantry warfare
Crap: I have to re-buy the Pals book now. He added a theorist.
Eight Theories on Religion
What used to be "Seven Theories on Religion" is now "Eight Theories on Religion". Personally, I liked the flow to the title better when there were only seven theorists, but whatever, right? I found out about the change when updating my Amazon.com wishlist this morning. (Figured if I posted it yesterday, I should bring it up to date.)
I paid my OSU parking fine today. $25 they charged me for being at an expired meter just before I left for Walking With Fire this year. I consider it the cost of doing research, because the OSU Center for Epigraphy Studies was so helpful. They even let me make several hundred copies at no charge, so escaping with only a $25 parking fine is well worth it, I think.
I spent some time this morning remembering, which is what one is supposed to do today.
I have recently been re-reading The Western Way of War: Infantry Battle in Classical Greece by Victor Davis Hanson, a man I heard speak about the battle of Delium, one of the most horrific battles in history and the first recorded example of fratricide in battle. I still shudder thinking about his description of the Athenian realization that they were killing each other.
The thing about Hanson's book (and others like it) is that it does not focus on strategy or tactics, but on what the individual experienced: why he fought, how tactics and strategy influenced the experience of battle, and the way these things focused themselves directly into theory of war that the west embraced and still holds as the highest form of combat.
It's books like this that got me into military history. Well, books like this and Stan Czaplak, but that's a whole other story.
Current Location: South
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "West Nashville Grand Ballroom Gown", -JB
|
November 27th, 2006
04:17 pm - Mirror Lake, Jumping In, and Asking Questions That Don't Need Answers
Two weeks ago was Michigan Week, the week before Ohio State plays Michigan, usually for "all the marbles" (or at least a good number of them). But this entry isn't about sports. It's about the strange things that happen surrounding The Game on this campus, with particular attention to the truly odd pasttime of jumping into Mirror Lake before the game.
( Yes, this year we won all the marbles )
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/classic/confused.gif) curious
Current Music: "Death of an Unpopular Poet", -JB
|
November 17th, 2006
09:50 am - Wagering on the Game
I have sent a message to the Senior Druid of the Ann Arbor ADF Grove, Shining Lakes (and copied uberrod), detailing my proposition for what they need to do, should Ohio State beat Michigan on Saturday.
On my way into work, though, I noticed this message of hope and redemption on a church sign:
Good to know that combining deity and sports is a cross-religion phenomenon
It's fun to play a bit with the Game, and to enjoy it like this. Some people are, of course, against any reference to sports in their religion, which has always confused me.
In particular, I noticed that making small, friendly wagers between other Big Ten schools (I've made bets with sleepingwolf about Penn State-OSU games for two years now, and will make wagers with his Grove, should he ever get around to starting one. . . hinthinthint) are good for bringing the Groves a bit closer. We now have Groves in many Big Ten cities (working on Purdue, Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa, Michigan State, and Penn State. . . remember that there are 11 teams in the Big Ten Conference), so it might be fun to expand to a few other schools with wagers, too.
Last year, we had a small procession from Ann Arbor come down and attend our Imbolc rite. . . something that wouldn't have happened without the OSU-Michigan game.
I suppose, in the end, that it all depends on how you see it.
Btw, the terms I suggested for this year?
If OSU wins, Shining Lakes donates an equal number of canned goods to the shelter/foodbank of their choice as we collect this quarter.
Pending their half of the wager.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw", -JB
|
November 8th, 2006
06:31 pm - Univeristy Interfaith?
I have just returned from my first Univeristy Interfaith Association meeting.
It was a very interesting experience.
Now, for some background, about four years ago, I made the following statement:
"I see interfaith debate as counter-productive to religion."
The reasons for that statement are rather varied, but in particular, it was a reaction to the various invitations to "interfaith" debate that was really an invitation to a "why aren't you Christian yet" debate, which were the only sort of "interfaith dialogues" I had ever had at the time.
Over the past three or so years, I've softened my stance on interfaith dialogue, been involved with Muslim dialogue groups, and become comfortable enough in my conversations with people to call them on things like the "why aren't you Christian yet" debate.
I serve as the primary contact for the University Interfaith Association at the Office of Information Technology at Ohio State. This particular facet of my job was one of the first things I was ever given full charge of when I started here. I never really thought much about it: it was a job task, one that I did because I had to.
But recently, I started looking into what they do. It seems that they're extremely accepting, and generally full of good people. I realized that I hadn't been treating this particular customer as well as I could have, and so I asked my boss if I could go to one of their meetings, which are open and have guest speakers.
Sara said yes, so long as I tell them I'm a representative from the campus Satanists.
Well, I didn't do that, but I did get in touch with my contact there and ask if I could show up, and where it was. He said I most certainly could, so I made the plans.
This morning, I walked in, was welcomed, and sat down next to my contact. I learned a lot about counseling from the nice lady who was speaking, and a lot about how the University deals with spirituality, religion, and religious diversity.
And I found myself wondering if I really ought to be working with them. . . more than just as their OIT contact.
There's more to come on this front, I think. New territory, new directions.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: curious
Current Music: "If the Phone Doesn't Ring, It's Me", -JB
|
July 10th, 2006
11:58 am - Trying to get back, baby. Back to where we were.
I've been hearing from lots of places, quite honestly, that I'm just not keeping up my end of the "friendship" bargains I have with lots of people. I haven't been hanging out with them, or relaxing with them, or sending them email. I've been "short" in my responses, sometimes ignored entire emails, and often missed events like parties and dinners that I've tried to get to.
And I wish I could fix it.
But right now, I'm more busy than I've been in a long time. Far, far more busy. Work is harder, and so is play. My research has taken on a life of its own, and I've been sucked into it. I'm at a point now where things like reading Latin are getting a bit easier, and to put that on hold will undo a lot of work I've done. I'm also out of money, entirely, at the moment, and am living about a quarter paycheck behind, so getting places (and managing to eat) have taken a back seat in most cases.
So I suppose what this entry is about is, "Hey, I love you guys. Just please don't be offended or think I'm avoiding you. It's just not an easy life right now. But I'll be back. Things will get better: they always do."
Just be patient with me, please.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Knees of My Heart", -JB
|
March 20th, 2006
07:12 pm - Catchin' up and making things work right.
So for about two weeks, I haven't read LJ entries. I'm shocked: I only had to go back about 800 entries to pick up where I left off.
Wanted to drop a note and apologize for not being timely in my replies, and to update from my last sets of entries:
No, no dates. One day, maybe. Part of the issue, of course, is that I'm pretty passive about the dating thing. Then again, I'm a big proponent of trouble finding me, not the other way around. Shocking how rarely that fails.
Yes, the paper went all right. I aced the class. But I'm still not happy with the paper, and might do heavy revisions.
Things are looking good with that clergy thing. While I did finish the GSP stuff, I've been fighting a losing battle to get it into submittable shape. Should be there shortly, like the next few days. But it's all finished.
I'm immensely proud of the spear I made. Pictures should be forthcoming. The ritual it was designed for went well, also. I'm thinking it's time to internalize some things.
My boots got muddier (thanks, perlgirlju), I watched some Phillip K. Dick movies and some vampire movies with some wonderful women, and I'm feelin' good.
Tomorrow, I pick up Tina at the airport. She's been gone a week. Tonight, I clean house.
And now, I'm out, because it's after 7 PM, and I shouldn't be here now.
Life is freakin' good right now. Today, I'm happy.
Could you stand a little closer, girl?
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: "Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes", -JB
|
|
|
