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October 15th, 2009
03:52 pm - Re-viewing my work I have just finished reading the responses that Ian Corrigan provided when he approved my coursework prior to my initiation. I thoroughly enjoy the responses he's provided to me in the past: they are generally detailed, full of thoughtful suggestions, and always to the point with a bit of humour. (Apparently, due to a spelling error, I indicated that new GO's get mentors from other groves who "ass" those new GO's. I think I meant "assist.")
Going through those comments, though, also gave me a chance to review my own work, which, aside from being full of spelling errors because I write everything in notepad anymore, is actually pretty good. I was particularly pleased with myself when I re-read the trance induction for lighting a fire.
I honestly didn't remember writing this piece, and reading it was like reading it for the first time. I suspect that I was so focused on getting the job done that I just sort of missed the fact that I was doing the job, if that makes any sense.
I'm focusing on CTP3 work now, getting a good amount done in advance of completion of CTP 2, actually (my papers are in pending review), which is nice.
Ah, well: back to burying my head in spreadsheets! Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Southern Cross", -JB
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July 8th, 2009
02:10 pm - Upcoming Projects I have been, it is probably pretty clear, very un-project-oriented for the past year or so; since the revision of The Dedicant Path Through the Wheel of the Year (affectionately known as WotY), I've put nearly all major projects on the back-burner, getting very little done.
Some projects have been finished: the ADF Clergy Training Program Circles 2 and 3 are now written and complete (though my own coursework is not), and the Liturgist Guild Study Program is also very close to "presentation-polished" for the rest of the Guild to look at. These are the result of minor things I did that were helped along amazingly by others, though, in my mind.
As things have become more. . . "normal" at work recently (for a while there it was balls-to-the-wall-day-and-night-what-the-hell-is-sleep-and-you-don't-get-to-be-parted-from-your-computer sort of stuff), I feel that old project-orientation coming back into play. So, in that spirit, here are a few things that I need to get caught up on, along with some thoughts on them.
- The Fire On Our Hearth (affectionately known as FooH): This is, as many of you know, the Grove's devotional book. We intended to get a "second edition" out around April 1 of this year, and it just. . . didn't happen. Mostly (okay, entirely), this is my fault: see above. But, as I look at a July that's pretty free of festivals and compulsory travel, I think we may be able to finish this out before Summerland, which would be pretty awesome.
- The Chronarchy.Com Store: This was originally going to supplement my income (it already has, to an extent, even though it's not open for business yet), and the stock includes things like portable altars, rune dice, Discordian Furthark dice, actual elder futhark rune sets, sigil dice, Greek divination tiles, and amulets. The issue has been an inability to create the requisite stock to actually open a store (I have a sneaking suspicion that the demand will be highest when it opens, and then it'll drop off). So, materials are prepared, I just haven't managed to make enough dice, rune sets, and altars to actually be comfortable opening the shop. I'd like to manage that soon, but it really requires a weekend without distraction to make three or four sets of any of these things.
- WotY: Edition 3: Since the "new" Dedicant Path handbook came out (sort of) recently, this is creeping up the list of things I need to do. For the most part, I need to update it so that it reflects the page numbers in the "new" DP book, as right now it's still referencing the old DP book. The current WotY outline can remain, of course, but
Ian Corrigan has brought up an interesting point about it: it could be far less academic and far more of a real "working" document, with ritual texts, meditations, and deeper guidance. This concept excites me, and I honestly very much want to make it something less like a homework schedule and more like a course of spiritual study (though the homework schedule would remain). And this leads me to the next item: - An IP and CTP WotY: Recent discussions about Orders within ADF, the IP work that
Ian Corrigan is doing, and some of my own comments about things I'd like to see within the CTP itself have led me into considering a more "as I go through this" sort of approach to a new WotY for the IP and CTP. There's room for as many IP/CTP training documents within ADF as we'd like to create, I think, and the more I think about this, the more excited I become about the whole prospect. This is a real thing in my mind, something that'll happen one of these days. As of now, though, it's partially unstarted, though the notes I'm taking are already taking some shape. - The Trillium Project:
sleepingwolf and I got this started at Trillium, and we've been working to expand it. . . This is likely to be the first project I finish, as I hope to send my part off to him sometime this week, if work doesn't hit the fan again.
So, those are the current projects I'm oriented toward and bringing online. They're all contingent on me continuing to work on my CTP work, and on work staying settled for a bit, but I think they're all doable. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Son of a Son of a Sailor", -JB
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June 24th, 2009
03:05 pm - Renewing OL I see that it's coming to be about that time: time to renew my Oak Leaves subscription.
There was a while when I couldn't really afford OL, but man, I missed it terribly. It's a great little Mag, with all sorts of great items in it (and, often, on it), and the various editors we've seen have done a great job adding their own touches to it here and there ever since cortigiana took over the editing years ago. I've also enjoyed writing for it and submitting things: speaking of, I probably ought to look at what more I can scrape together to submit here soon! Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season", - JB
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June 18th, 2009
03:15 pm - CTP work and an ambush by the Creative Commons license Not long ago (in fact, about two weeks ago), I got re-involved with my IP/CTP work. Something's been tripping me up, though, and I realized that it's a combination of two things:- Time to look up sources when I'm at home, and
- Some weird notion that I've done all the "easy" stuff.
Really, there's nothing in the CTP that's easy, and nothing in the CTP that's hard. It just all is. I just need to take the time to do it, and soon. Clock's a-tickin'.
I also discovered (and was somewhat appalled to discover this) that some of my work has been released under the Creative Commons license. While I'm about as kopyleft as you can get with my work, I am rather opposed to it having anything to do with Creative Commons, particularly without my permission. The restrictions on the CC licenses bug the crap out of me, honestly (of course, with my pleasure at working in a kopyleft framework, I should point out that it only bugs me because the Attribution tag means that people have to say they got it from me, while the ShareAlike tag means that derivative works must also be under the CC license, both of which I feel are unfair restrictions).
Amusingly, all work is automatically copyrighted, so one must go through and de-copyright it to make it kopyleft. I rarely get around to that. I do occasionally use the "©" symbol, more because there is no reversed symbol available in regular HTML, and it really is just simpler to type "all work © MJD" than saying "all work copyleft by MJD". The © you see on my site is left over from before I knew about kopyleft, actually: I just haven't changed it (mostly because I'd have to do it by hand on every page. . . poor planning).
Still, the CC license annoys me because it insinuates things about my work that aren't true. At least with copyright, people will ask if they can use it or ignore the copyright altogether (both of which are cool by me). With CC, they think they're free to use it but have to use it in specific ways, which is not cool by me. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: "Desperation Samba (Halloween in Tijuana)", -JB
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June 10th, 2009
02:45 pm - Musings on Chaos Magic Many years ago, I read a certain article about chaos magic, one that struck me as rather poignant. It's called "GO UNDERGROUND and be a CHAOS MAGICIAN" and is form Joel Biroco's The Exorcist of Revolution. While it's generally an aimless meandering through Biroco's brain (though not at all uninteresting), the thrust of it is that Chaotes cannot be a part of the corporate world and really practice their craft to its greatest depths and heights.
It was from this essay that I first got an image of the peddling magician, creating amulets out of discarded aluminum cans and bits of string and held together with old chewed gum, a sort of modern day begging priest, or goes for you Hellenes out there. I have always liked this model, always thought that it was something that we need in this society, and always thought that there might be a place for me to do such a thing. Well, perhaps not the discarded gum part.
Re-reading the essay, though, brought me to think on it a bit more than I had in the past. I would fall into the "nine-to-five magician" category that Biroco holds up: I live in a corporate world, and the thought of quitting right now does, indeed, scare the hell out of me. I'm pleased with my job, where I am, and where I am going. Contentment, which I'm sure would be frowned upon by Biroco, is something I know in this place right now, even if it is sometimes a bit stressful and often a very hard job.
On the other hand, I purposefully did not arrive here through magical means, nor through ritual, nor even through prayer. I did no work other than the work of my own hands to make it here, put on no ceremonial clothes outside of the suit I interviewed in and the clothes I chose to wear daily, spoke no incantations beyond the statements made in my interview, and manipulated the selection process only by submitting a resumé. Biroco's "nine-to-five magicians" ignore their impulses for a more romantic life, and direct their mystical work toward their own career direction.
Suddenly, I fit the one-tracked, stunted "nine-to-five magician" mold a bit less.
In many ways, I find that the focus I have now (and have always had, though sometimes to greater extent than others) on being careful about what I practice magic for and who I practice it for/on has mitigated some of the limitations of the corporate world that could trap a guy like me: I practice neither on nor for myself. I've developed some interesting amulets over the years (the Cthulhu amulet being one of my favourites), done some amazing sigil work, involved myself in healing rituals that went better than I could have imagined, and given offerings for all sorts of people in amazingly sacred spaces (high on Mt. Olympus and beneath the Temple of Apollo at Delphi being the best of them). All this work was done for others, or at the request of others, and there's very little direct benefit to myself. Certainly, none of it is directed at my choice of career path.
Do I agree with Biroco's thesis, that I am not the magician I could be were I free of the shackles of oppression that the 9-5 world has clasped me in? I think that he might be right on that point. The other half of his thesis, though, that exiting society's rules is the only way to go, that it somehow naturally creates the Chaote and brings him/her to a state of deep magics with great heights, is flawed.
Chaotes are self-made: there Biroco and I appear to agree fully. What I don't agree with, though, is that environments themselves are enough to set our fates and overcome the self-making process.
We are who we are because we wish to be ourselves: no more, no less. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "The Great Filling Station Holdup", -JB
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May 2nd, 2009
08:24 am - An understanding of death
It was a sort of odd feeling, in the wee hours of the Trillium morning [review], when I came to an understanding of death and what it meant to me.
I was writing my workshop, entitled, "An Awfully Big Adventure: Signposts on the Final Journey of Indo-European Souls," and was describing the things met along the way to the Otherworld: the two fires that separate the soul and the body, the various wells and waters, the ferryman who carries you across, the dog who devours, and the king of the dead himself. Over the past few months I've been dealing with death in various ways, considering my own views on it.
I probably ought to back up for a moment: I'm not much of one to dwell on afterlives. In general, my attitude has always been one of "we don't know, and won't until we get there." This has served me pretty well, honestly, for many years, and I have never thought of a coherent afterlife theory as being a requirement for leading a religious life. I had a (perhaps very Indo-European) view that it's not where we end up in the next life that matters, but how we act and what we do in this life. Sort of an expansion of the "it's not the destination, it's the journey" notion that folk often spout out.
Anyway, as I was finishing up the workshop, I found myself putting the pieces together in my head. Using Bruce Lincoln's Death, War and Sacrifice: Studies in Ideology and Practice, I discovered that I was coming to very different conclusions than Lincoln did about what happens after death: his theory was very pessimistic; mine turned out not to be.
In the end, Lincoln responds to the IE myth by saying that there is nothing after death at all: "the otherworld," he says, "[is] nothing more than the grave."
My own response is very different. Death, in an IE sense, really means something: escape from the greedy monster of old age, escape from worry and care, an opportunity to live forever in bliss or knowledge, and (perhaps most importantly) a chance to maintain the cosmos in an ultimate way: to be bound by the Rta or Xartus in the most physical and lasting way possible, by reversing the cycle of creation and thus maintaining the cosmos.
I took my cue for this from the Rgveda, of course. . . Hymn X.16, a hymn regarding the funeral.
May your eye go to the sun, your breath to the wind: go to the heaven and to the earth according to rule, or go to the Waters, if there it is ordained for you! Among the plants to take your place with your limbs! In other words, when you die, the things that formed you at your creation are returned to the cosmos, to live forever within the cosmic order.
I summed this up some time ago in an ancestor prayer you may have seen, not knowing that I would return to it during this workshop, and find myself understanding death as a result of my writing it:
When you were born, The earth became your body, The stone became your bone, The sea became your blood, The sun became your eye, The moon became your mind, The wind became your breath.
When you passed to the Otherworld, Your breath became the wind, Your mind became the moon, Your eye became the sun, Your blood became the sea, Your bone became the stone, Your body became the earth.
When we were born, you did the same for us: You called forth the earth and rocks; The sea arose and the sun descended; The moon shone down and the winds sang. For those who come after, we shall do as you did for us When we are gone, we shall do as you did before. When I gave that workshop later in the day, I suspect a sense of my awe at the epiphany was pretty conspicuous, though I tried to hide it as best I could.
In many ways, I'm not ready to face the death of someone I dearly love, no matter how near that possibility may have just been for me, but I find myself now with a more complete toolkit for dealing with it when it does, inevitably, happen to me. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: surprised Current Music: "Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season", - JB
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April 9th, 2009
11:59 pm - Writing of dawn before she dawned upon my mind. . . It occurred to me, moments ago, that I had written a story (inspired by a Grateful Dead lyric I heard when Jimmy Buffett covered "Uncle John's Band") about the beauty of the dawn, long before I had ever kindled a fire at dawn and called out to Usas in prayer:
The Crow's Story
One day, I'd like to find an illustrator and turn it into a children's book. It's probably one of my favourite things that I've ever written. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: tired Current Music: "Good Guys Win", -JB
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February 4th, 2009
07:27 am - 1,500: Reviewing my vocational statement ( Here is a basic timeline of my tenure in ADF. It's relevant, I promise. )
Not so long ago, I started thinking back on the work I've done as ADF Clergy, and began re-exploring the vocation I have for it.
I started down this path in college: old journals turn up statements like, "If I were Catholic, I'd be in seminary right now." I know now, looking back on it, that I was feeling a call to lead services and help others for a very long time, even before I'd graduated high school.
I remember when the Universal Life Church put their ordinations online and opened up access to the entire world. I also remember making the conscious decision not to obtain ordination in that way. I didn't make that choice because I felt it was an invalid method of becoming clergy, or because I thought it was beneath me; rather, I felt it was not the right path for me to take.
What was important to me was not ordination. It was not the powers conferred by the state or by other priests. It turned out that I didn't see ordination or priesthood in that way.
What I wanted was recognition of status achieved by the body of my chosen spiritual community.
I remember feeling shocked and somewhat embarrassed that the ADF Unity Rite I was consecrated in was so much about me. Every invocation and evocation mentioned me, with the Kindreds being addressed and asked to support me and give me strength during their invitation. I didn't know what that meant at the time, but I do now. It wasn't about the various Priests recognizing me, but about the fact that I'd done things within ADF to the point that the recognition was just right. It just came naturally to them. I don't believe any instruction for those invocations was ever given to those who participated in the rite: they just did it.
That thought, by the way, humbles me even more deeply, and makes me even more embarrassed in retrospect.
It has been, now, nearly three years since I took my oath that day, and dedicated my head, my heart, and my hands to this journey that we call ADF.
The other day, I went back to my Clergy Vocational Statement, and re-read it for the first time in over two years. I wanted to see what was still relevant, and get at why I chose to go this route in the first place. I know that I still struggle with being clergy. I know that Priesthood in ADF is still something that I sometimes question. I know that I still feel like a rookie apprentice among learned old wizards. But much about what I thought was calling me has changed.
( I made some astute statements. )
( I also made some rather. . . un-astute statements. )
A lot of what I thought would be the focus of my clergy work simply isn't the focus. The things I love to do, including the training program development, the ritual, and the simple joy of being a part of this experiment that is "Our Own Druidry," are still vibrant. But my expectations have changed so much. My own struggles with relating the GSP work to Clergy training were complicated enough: I felt untrained and underdeveloped when I started, but I have realized that I will always feel like that (and, should I stop feeling like that, I'll know I have a problem!).
The thing is, I'm a very different person than I was before my Consecration. It changed me, and time has changed me further. Despite that, some people will not see me as changed, but as the kid I was when they knew me before that ritual. Some will not see me as the kid I was before, but only who I am now.
And some, those closest to me, I think, will know the change deeply, and will understand it better than I do myself. And with the changes I have undergone, they will find that it is not me that changed, but it is my true self that emerged and began to develop itself. I know this because I am more at home with myself than I was three years ago, struggling through a hard breakup and really experiencing what it was like to be scared and alone for the first time; more at home with myself than I was ten years ago, struggling to find meaning in college coursework without a clear goal in sight; and more at home than I was fifteen years ago, stumbling onto Paganism in Caesar's Commentarii de Bello Gallico and praying for the first time to divinities I found in my Latin class.
And this, my friends, is what excites me about the prospect of Ordination within ADF: if Consecration can change me in such beautiful ways, what changes are in store for me when I am a fully Ordained Priest?
This is my 1,500th LiveJournal entry, and I want to thank those who have read this journal since 2002. My longest readers are the most special to me, and I often think about what you must have seen as you've followed this blog. Don't worry, there is much more to come. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: indescribable Current Music: "Landfall", -JB
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October 30th, 2008
03:35 pm - Setting the plan in motion Part of being open and honest about my process through the Clergy Training Program has led me to an update of Chronarchy.Com. The front page now includes some of my smaller updates to the DP, as well as a chart of Study Program work (and due dates). More amusingly, it also includes a recently declassified government "Report on Discordian Cleansing Rituals" I've stumbled across that some might find interesting.
Finding ways to meet your goals sometimes takes some creative self-bitchslapping, I find. For me today, it's updating the page I see 10 to 20 times per day with my schedule, just to keep myself on track! Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: calm Current Music: "Cheeseburger in Paradise", -JB
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July 1st, 2008
11:58 am - Sulis and Taranis, a stolen wheel, and more bay leaves After speaking with seamus_mcnasty about "resting on one's laurels" after the Pride Service (see yesterday's post), I opened up the Book of Three Cranes and read through our omens for the past few weeks/months. I've posted a couple of times in the last week over at 3cg_blog about omens, and since early May, we've seen an increased need to take stock of them. As I read them, there is a need to push the envelope some, to go further, and to retain the fire that makes this Grove dynamic and keeps us moving.
So, instead of our traditional invocations, Summer Solstice became "Storytime."
( Read about the process and sourcing )
Here is the story I told:
The Stolen Wheel
It is said that long ago, when even the gods were young, Taranis, the Thunderer, saw Sulis, the Sun, bathing at dawn.
Each morning, Sulis would rise from the cosmic waters at the edge of the world. As she rose from the waters, she would blush deeply, and only a glimpse of her could be seen as she ascended into her chariot. No man was allowed to look upon her, for she was young and beautiful, untouched.
Once she had mounted her chariot, whose wheel is the sun, she would ride all day, the wheel shining brightly as it turned along the path, until she returned once again to her bath in the cosmic waters, the aquae sulis.
The god Taranis had heard of her beauty, and though he knew that it was not allowed, he went one morning to see her bathe. Cloaked in his stormclouds to hide his form, he went down to the waters' edge. Taranis was not subtle, however, and Sulis refused to leave the waters.
"Who is there?" she called out.
Thinking quickly, he disguised his voice. "It is I, Epona's handmaiden, come to see your horses."
"But there is nothing wrong with my horses," Sulis responded, puzzled.
"My Lady fears one may be lame. Let me check them while you prepare for your journey."
Sulis agreed, knowing now that it was no man, but a maiden who had come to visit her. As Taranis hid beneath his cloak of clouds, Sulis exited the waters. Instantly, he was struck with lust, and plotted to see more of her.
"How are my horses?" Sulis asked.
"They are fine, my dear," answered Taranis. "Now, be on your way."
And so Taranis watched in awe as she passed by him, wondering how he might see her, so beautiful and naked, again. She mounted the chariot, flicked her reins, and disappeared behind the bright, shining sun wheel.
Taranis knew he must see her again. To do this, he left and flew to the west, intent on stealing the wheel of the sun, for he could not look upon her while the wheel shone so brightly.
He set his ambush far away, placing his clouds in the sky in the west, knowing that she could only travel a fixed path. He waited until the afternoon, and then began to approach the chariot of the sun.
He cast wide his cloak of clouds, racing forth in his own thundering chariot, obscuring the light of Sulis by covering the wheel. He stole the wheel from the axle and hid it deep within the folds of his cloak, laughing peels of thunder at his cleverness.
But Sulis was no weak woman. She was far-seeing and knew things beyond earth, sea and sky. She knew her path, though the cloak of clouds was dark, and she called on the horses to follow it. As the horses pulled, she dismounted the chariot and lifted the axle on her own, carrying it forth, becoming bright herself in the process. Taranis was once again blinded, though this time it was with a beauty born of strength unexpected.
When Taranis saw this, he was in awe—so beautiful a goddess, and yet so strong in her own right. Ashamed, he averted his eyes, admitted the spying, and replaced the wheel. He set Sulis gently on her chariot, and began to ride his away.
As Sulis became once again visible in the daylight sky, and and the clouds receded, Taranis offered one final apology: he reflected the inner light of Sulis' beauty, and brought us the rainbow, the most magnificent display of fire in water.
Children of the earth, this is the story of the Wheel of the Sun, how the Thunderer stole it, and the beauty of his apology to an underestimated woman.
Some aspects of the story are common themes: the cross-dressing (though it's very muted) of the Thunder God; the image of Dawn as a maiden, blushing just in case anyone sees her; the world as bounded by waters on all sides; and the creation of a rainbow as a sort of promise are all things you find just about everywhere. I sort of riffed on those themes, not quite sure where the story would go, and found myself writing it mostly without pause from start to finish, not quite knowing how it would end, myself.
As I wrote the story above, I found myself writing from deep within my heart. Particularly at the forefront of my mind were some of my own relationships with very strong, beautiful women, and the feeling that sometimes, others forget that there's just so much more to them than a beautiful face.
In the end, the story is one part ancient mythology, one part creativity, and one part mythologizing the women I love so deeply because of their fathomless inner strengths. I would name them now, but I don't particularly want to embarrass them (or leave any of them out!). The central action of Sulis carrying the chariot, and her beauty being in her strength of character and knowledge of what is right, as well as its unexpected but true nature, is the key to this story, in my mind.
I loved telling the story in ritual. Getting the "Monty Python-esque falsetto" down for Taranis' hand-maiden alter-ego was something I tried to practice, but it came out so much better *in* ritual than outside of it that I have to call it Awen.
I particularly like the fact that it really went so well, and flowed so nicely. And, I hope, we'll find more of this sort of thing in our rituals, at least from time to time. It is good to praise the Kindreds with creativity and joy in our hearts, and it is good to let the folk know who these Kindreds really are.
Oh, and yeah, we got great omens :) Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Changes in Latitudes, Changes in Attitudes", -JB
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November 5th, 2007
11:10 am - Oops. Maybe that explains how I act :) I don't often do memes anymore, but every so often one will catch my attention. Today's attention was caught by a quiz about Asperger's:
( The quiz results behind the cut )
It interests me that I generally fall in the category of "almost but not quite" when taking tests for signs of Asperger's.
Another test is here, on which I scored a 24 (after learning to read the script since it didn't calculate the score for me) with 32 being the threshold and 16 being the "normal" state for most folks.
( Why the hell do I keep taking these tests? )
Well, that was a bit of unintentional soul-searching. But it was intriguing to write. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "The Wino and I Know", -JB
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October 10th, 2007
09:39 am - Chronarchy and the Fox
At the Clergy Retreat this past weekend (which I was only able to attend for about 10 hours), during the Order Work, I encountered an old friend.
While walking across the green plain, I passed a fox. He was dressed for travel, and walking on his hind legs, a bag and a stick slung over his shoulder, almost like a child who had run away from home, but his step was sure and he was focused on his destination.
In my first vision, he tipped his hat and continued walking. In this vision, he smiled with a toothy grin and turned around to walk with me.
As we traveled, we discussed things. Many of these things are simply unimportant to the present re-telling, so I will leave them.
What is important, though, is the very direct message that this old friend gave me:
He said, "You have a long way to go."
Then he looked at me squarely. "Start already."
And with that, he turned and continued on his way, and I continued on mine. But I certainly have not and will not forget what he said, and I certainly know exactly what it meant.
Maybe one day, he'll show me what's in that bag of his. I know what it is, even though I've never seen it. I knew when I first saw the bag a year ago.
I hope he doesn't think it's a little red hen. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: optimistic Current Music: "Brand New Country Star", - JB
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September 24th, 2007
01:46 pm - Out with an old prayer, in with the new: adventures in altering liturgy
When Three Cranes Grove, ADF, started, we lifted our liturgy almost entirely from The 6th Night Grove, ADF. I am particularly not ashamed of this little fact, because (quite honestly) it's a good liturgy and it's very "ADF Traditional", if such a thing could be said to exist.
One aspect of the liturgy we lifted, though, has been bugging me for some time. I believe this was added in by Amergin, actually, and I may have modified it slightly when we brought it over. It's called the "Universal Spirit Prayer," and it's something that I've mostly retained because of its familiarity to me, personally. It's one of those key ritual elements that puts me into a ritual mindset every time I hear it or say it.
Honestly, no one has ever complained about it or asked if we could leave it out. It's always been a part of our liturgy. Here's the text:
Universal Spirit Prayer:
You who are without name You who are without gender You who are without form Spirit which exists in all Creation
We, the Children of the Earth Call out to you And ask that you bless this work and our lives. So be it. I started thinking about this sometime early last year, though: this prayer really doesn't fit well with ADF's cosmology.
As I thought about this prayer, what it meant to me, what it meant to the Grove, and what it meant in ritual context, it became more and more clear to me that it was time to sort of. . . steer away from its use.
The straw that really broke the camel's back on my feelings about this particular prayer was the introduction of the ADF Core Order of Ritual, which includes a handy little section about "Items that ADF Rituals Do Not Include". There, point five is:
"Acknowledgment of one divine being with power over all"
And, of course, that's really what the US prayer is: acknowledgment of some nameless, formless, genderless . . . entity. Its placement, before the Earth Mother, as well as its general non-direction seem to empty the ritual into some sort of pan-henotheism (if such a thing can exist). I admit, that's not the direction I want to see us going.
( So I wrote a new one: my entire process for writing a single new prayer is behind the cut ) Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: accomplished Current Music: "Kick It In Second Wind", -JB
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September 12th, 2007
01:28 pm - Midnight Flame Festival, 2007
On Thursday, I picked up druidkirk from the airport. We were scheduled to be up in Michigan at the Midnight Flame Festival, hosted by Grove of the Midnight Sun and Grove of the Twilight Flame.
On Friday morning, we started driving north, running up US 23 and arriving about an hour before sunset. We were greeted warmly, and I was scolded for driving too fast in the campground.
The campground itself is amazing: there is cabin and tent camping, and the stars. . . my gods, they were beautiful. The area has almost no light pollution, and you can see deep into the Heavens and the shining night. The cabins were rather comfortable (I slept with druidkirk and Skip), and the bath and toilet facilities were also quite nice. The weather was absolutely beautiful for the entire weekend, too: I couldn't have imagined better weather.
When I asked about the program, I found out that Skip, druidkirk and I were the program, which amused me to no end. Fortunately, we more than managed to fill in all of Saturday with no dead time, really.
 2/3 of the program
The first night was spent enjoying a roaring fire with a chimney log, ( which can be seen behind the cut )
We used this fire for our first night's ritual fire, as well, and Flip opened the Gates as he strode around it. ( You can watch the video behind the cut )
All day Saturday were workshops, with druidkirk presenting on sacrifice, me presenting on prayer, and Skip doing his "Food and Drink in Indo-European Societies" class. We also worked in some pretty heavy trancework after Skip's presentation, doing the Bear Posture from Dr. Goodman's Where the Spirits Ride the Wind. Honestly, the workshop lineup ended up being quite well-done, with each one working in and dovetailing nicely with the rest of the workshops.
I was particularly happy with the way the trancework ended up working out. It was nice to sit down and talk with folk about the posture after we'd done it, and see the commonality of experience wasn't just a fluke with the last time I'd done this posture in a group.
On Saturday night, the Unity Ritual included a wonderful healing working. druidkirk did the healing work, and I'm tasked with following it up as the moon begins to wax. It was also nifty to see how these two Norse Groves do ritual, which isn't something I've really had a solid opportunity to experience.
But probably the best part was meeting ADF members I'd never met before. Really, the theme of the festival really was one of Ghosti and hospitality. I also discovered that both Skip and druidkirk are more outgoing than I am, but I knew that anyway. I met a lot of new people this past weekend, and I expect that I'll stay in general correspondence with a few. There's something about going to the outskirts of our American Groves that just can't be defined.
I hope that folk will come out for next year's Midnight Flame Festival. It was certainly worth the drive for me. A couple of people mentioned that it would have been great if folk from Shining Lakes had come up, and a few others were also hoping to draw some Wisconsin or Minnesota members over next year. I do hope that they come up.
Anyway, the festival was relaxing, intimate, and truly a joy to attend. I highly recommend this one to anyone who can go. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Livingston Saturday Night", -JB
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July 13th, 2007
08:42 am - Adventures in Currency Conversion I have previously admitted to being low on cash. How low, one might ask? Well, on Monday morning, I was $24 short of having enough cash to pay my mortgage, which is due on Saturday.
Step one was to sell off all the books I knew I'd never look at or read again. This gathered me about $5 (or approximately a quarter per book). "Okay," I thought, "you're 20% of the way there."
The next thing I thought about was selling sets of rune dice. I've been making these with some industry for a while now, and I have a few sets made up.
( They look like this )
The central issue with that is that it doesn't solve my immediate need (as orders need filling and cash needs transferred and yada/yada/yada and I only have until Saturday to deposit this cash). So I started thinking about other things I could do.
After a lot of thought and a lot of false starts on things (such as selling Discordian Futhark runes on apples ( that look like this ) I decided that I would take the 30 Euros I had down to the currency exchange and get me some real American Dollars!
( In which hilarity ensues, things work out alright, my mortgage is paid, and I get back to work in a reasonable amount of time and even eat lunch )
And all it took was asking the airport to shove a Boeing 757 up my ass. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: amused Current Music: "Carnival World", -JB
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July 9th, 2007
02:47 pm - And On the Sixth Night, the Druids Harvested the All-Heal
So, I spent last night working on this ritual.
The Grove requested that we do more rituals at our last business meeting. I am, of course, happy to oblige them, and so I started doing research.
One of the specific requests was that we start doing rituals based on the cycles of the moon. Somehow, I had the brilliant idea of doing a sixth night of the new moon ritual.
Of course, this meant digging through sources, since I was suddenly of the idea that maybe I should try and have some real grounding in what happened in Gaul on said night.
So a problem arose: the original rite, according to Pliny, involves a golden sickle and sacrificing two bulls. As I can't afford a golden sickle and blood sacrifice just really isn't my cup 'o meat (especially a holocaust sacrifice, as it appears was done), I've had to find a way to take the spirit of the rite and translate it into a more modern ritual.
Fortunately for me, I'm feeling inspired recently.
( A bit on the process )
So as I worked on the ritual, I decided that the purpose would be two-fold:
- It would be our welcoming ceremony for new Grove members
- It would also do more inner work (trance and potentially ecstatic work) and help create a stronger Grove identity
I also decided that I would work outside the usual ADF Core Order of Ritual. Because this isn't a High Day ritual, I'm under no constraints, and while I have the COoR to work with for general ideas of structure, I'm completely free to exit it and abuse it (as, I feel, is proper for a list of items).
The rite itself will involve four key things: 1) Gaulish names for months (and variations on themes for them, such as Cantlos [song month] in September/October; this is an adaption from Kondratiev); 2) A more central role for Garanus, the Crane, in our Grove's hearth religion; 3) mistletoe, and actually giving it a strong functionality within our Grove; and 4) an actual mystery that simply can't be described (partially because I am not sure if I'm able to do it yet, though it's all worked out in my head).
I'm doing this whole "welcome to the Grove" thing without any oaths or real ritual terror; I'm not as interested as some folk (and traditions) are in hazing new members, no matter how much in fun it might be to the guy with the knife. Really, I just want us to affirm, ritually, our identity as Grove members, and to give some tangible benefit to those who join.
I'll have to find someone, at some point, to go over this liturgy with me and discuss it. I find, though, that I can't bounce ideas off people in my Grove, because if I'm going to try and work mystery and mysticism into a ritual, the element of surprise is crucial. It interests me how much I truly rely on their feedback in our usual rites, and how much I notice when I don't have it available.
At the next Liturgy Meeting (this Thursday), I'll get more verbose about my plans when I speak to the Grove. But, as a taste, I want all our current members to go through this as a "Grove welcoming", too, so that we obtain that shared experience.
Now, I just need one thing: a source for sprigs of mistletoe. Part of the issue is that I need them before August, when we will do our first of these rites: that's well before the holiday season (where you can sometimes get ahold of it).
Does anyone have a source for sprigs of mistletoe? Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: productive Current Music: "Frank and Lola", -JB
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June 13th, 2007
02:33 pm - A distinct lack of poetic talent is my meter. . . So there's this poem I've been working on. Its initial lines were typed in on Dec. 11, 2001, though it may be a few months older. It very much follows a certain. . . shall we say. . . lack of meter?
I've never actually lost interest in this poem. It's four pages long, and I just added three stanzas to make it just over that, but I don't often work on it. The title is "Teachings of a Woodcutter", and it's sort of modeled after the Havamal thematically.
It's an outgrowth of my first work as an ADF Dedicant, as I tried to understand the Nine Virtues. Each virtue (listed, even that early, as "three times three") receives an introductory stanza and three explanatory stanzas, with seven stanzas to introduce the entire poem. Each stanza is four lines long, with the number of feet per line being. . . well, "arbitrary" is an understatement.
After this week's experiments with "Kubla Khan" and the month-long experiment with Lugus and Rosemerta, I'm looking at this particular work as "in desperate need of fixing". This is rather amusing, given that it's not even finished yet.
So, tonight, I'm likely to keep working on this particular poem. I'm so far behind on "stuff" at this point that it isn't funny, but I've gotten some things done. I'd grumble about money, but, ya know, grumbling doesn't pay bills, so I'm off to find new ways to make cash instead.
Something's gotta give, and it ain't gonna be me. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: exhausted Current Music: "Off to See the Lizard", -JB
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June 7th, 2007
09:45 am - A letter to my local TV station After reading the story "Bears Make Themselves at Home", I wonder why NBC4 has chosen to run what amounts to an ad for someone seeking to put out a hit on a black bear. The last two paragraphs in particular are just what this article is:
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While she can't shoot the bear legally, Wilkins said she wouldn't be opposed to someone else taking care of the situation.
"I would not shoot it because I don't want to go to jail," she said. "But if someone else wants to shoot it, I would not care."
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From http://www.nbc4i.com/midwest/cmh/news.apx.-content-articles-CMH-2007-06-07-0003.html
According to the Division of Wildlife, there are between 50 and 100 bears in Ohio year round. They are listed as an endangered species in this state, and your willingness to run the above statements indicates that your organization is perfectly at peace with the idea of advertising that there is a bear who is "fair game" to be shot.
Ms. Wilkins' ignorance and disrespect for nature is only surpassed by your willingness to advertise such a reprehensible act for her. I'm honestly shocked that any news organization would run a story like that. Integrity isn't just about reporting what goes on, what people say, and what events occur; there is a strong aspect of social integrity that this particular article shows is lacking in your organization. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: angry Current Music: "Carnival World", -JB
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June 6th, 2007
04:22 pm - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007 Journal Entry 8
04/10/07 4:30 PM Delphi Beneath the Temple of Apollo Pythios
The air was still, cool. The scent of the earth filled my lungs. Outside, the "lifeguards" (little old ladies with whistles who sit in high places and tell people not to climb on the ruins) were blowing their whistles at overly adventurous tourists who didn't read the signs that say "No climbing" or "Do Not Touch". Men and women walked by, chattering in all manner of languages at their children.
And here I sat, alone in the darkness beneath the Temple of Apollo Pythios, with zylch outside standing watch for anyone official.
 the corridor beneath the Temple of Apollo Pythios
I made an offering of a coin to the God of the Temple, and began my meditation.
zylch had decided to do a Two Powers meditation, and I was originally planning to do the same, in order to accurately compare our experience. As I knelt down, though, and thought about where I was, I decided that simply opening in a meditative state was the ideal meditation here. So my eyes closed, my body relaxed, and I began to experience the place.
As I breathed in, I felt the cool darkness that places within the earth provide. The smell of the dirt and the dust in the air entered my lungs, and I sank deeper into the meditation. The stillness of the tunnel, so different from the chaotic outside, brought me deeper and deeper.
I expected to feel the presence of Apollo; after all, here I was below his temple, wondering if this was the tunnel to the fault where the Pythia found her inspiration. Instead, I found the earth. I found that this place might be sacred to Apollo above, but where the ground began, it was the earth, Gaea, who was truly the patron of this place.
I was no longer in the realm of the god of enlightenment, inspiration, and divination. I was at an entrance to a deity far older and far more present.
Soon, I ended my meditation and slipped out of the opening we had entered.
Later, zylch told me that she couldn't connect to the Sky Power.
I don't think the Sky Power is there. I don't think it can penetrate. I think the earth is all you will find supporting the Temple of Apollo Pythios, and all that supports Delphi.
Gaea may have been defeated here, but she was not supplanted.
| |  The Temple of Athena | Sunset over Delphi's port | Delphi's "Cafe Ichor" [end of journal, moment of non-journal follows]
I like the Cafe Ichor the best. I'm all about finding Lovecraftian things in sacred places :) (btw, it was a very nice cafe/bar sort of establishment, with pretty blue lighting and a rather sexy clientèle. Just the sort of place I'd like to hang out.)
ferrelux and I ran across this nifty glass picture, and I snapped a picture because I can't read Greek. The aim was for zylch to translate it for us. You know, if she's willing. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: awake Current Music: "Last Mango in Paris", -JB
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June 5th, 2007
09:19 am - Chronarchy.Com rss feed: preparing for update At least one person is already aware of this, but I never formally announced it.
As I began to prepare for my next update of Chronarchy.Com, I set up an RSS feed for the site, and each new page I put up is also put on that feed (with minor exceptions, because I'd hate to give away all my secrets). The feed has had an LJ syndication for a while (I set it up just before my paid account ended two weeks ago), but I don't think I've posted about it. So, here it is:
So far, I've updated a couple of rituals, a new article, and few new projects. There are a couple of things that are in the pipe and just waiting for me to have time to HTML-ify them (such as a fire-lighting ritual from the Rigveda Brahmanas) and my complete post-mortem on my trip to Greece. Once those are done, the website will be completely updated.
(the complete feed can be found at http://www.chronarchy.com/rss.xml)
There is also a feed for the Three Cranes site, , for those interested, which announces rituals, meeting minute updates, and other things like that. Current Location: Southeast of Disorder Current Mood: busy Current Music: "Take Another Road", -JB
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