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Ár nDraíocht Féin
Three Cranes
Chaos Matrix

September 27th, 2004

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12:15 pm - From Desert Magic, a profound experience. . .
On Sunday morning, I skipped the dawn ritual. I caught a bit of breakfast, and headed down to the stone circle (late) and got a sunny patch for the rite Ian and Liafal were leading. In this rite, we were to find our spirit ally and talk or bring him/her back. Before the visualization had even started, I was able to see what I would find as my spirit guide: millions and millions of cockroaches swarmed into the circle and around, and I watched them with great interest as they moved as one creature.

It was like watching a tidalwave rush over the stones. They broke against the fire stand and the well, they washed up the tree and back down. I watched as they swarmed over the others seated in the circle, inquisitively peeking at the ritual participants, who couldn't see a thing.

I lapsed back into listening to Ian and Liafal, watching the ebb and flow of the tide of cockroaches around me.

As we got into the visualization, one in particular stood out from the crowd. He was wearing a pair of Groucho Marx glasses and smoking a cigar, and he climbed onto my shoulder so he could guide me around. I've even drawn a picture of him.

The visualization took us away from the circle, and out into the desert around us.

We wandered for a while, talking, meeting other animals, and generally raising hell. We played a joke on a bear, pretended to be someone else's spirit animal (we let 'em know in the end), and sang a rousing rendition of "We Are the Champions" to a group of tortises who had challenged us to a game of volleyball. Eventually we came back.

We were invited to share our experiences, and to talk about our Sprit Guide if we were so moved. As we went around the circle, I was struck by all the cool totems everyone else had, and was a bit embarrassed by mine. A few mentioned eagles, hawks, or other birds, one mentioned a stag, a couple of wolves surfaced, and Nam mentioned a monkey, and spilled the water all over her neighbor in the circle. Finally, when it came to me, I called the cockroach by his common name, not his saintly name, saying: "Cockroach, for telling me why I couldn't have a cool totem."

It was a wonderfully powerful experience. Profound and comical, and I'm not ashamed to admit that such a powerful experience can be brought about in so simple a way.

Or maybe I'm making a totem out of a cockroach? Eh, I've seen worse :)
Current Mood: deviousdevious
Current Music: "Tonight I Just Need My Guitar", -JB

(7 comments Leave a comment)


(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
Date:September 27th, 2004 10:00 am (UTC)
It's amazing, but no one has ever picked up an extinct critter. I think I should do some real searching for an animal ally among the extinct.

Maybe a dodo bird?
Date:September 27th, 2004 10:54 am (UTC)
Hooo... If I'da seen that in any reality, I'd have run away with the screaming meemies.
[User Picture]
Date:September 27th, 2004 10:59 am (UTC)

Animal totems?

Do we really get to *pick* our totems, though? I thought they more or less 'picked' us. I'm sorry you got cockroaches, dear. If there is one species I'd really like to eliminate from the universe, that'd be the one, so certainly can see how you might be associated -- sort of a jokes-on-you thang. [shrug]
[User Picture]
Date:September 27th, 2004 11:23 am (UTC)
It certainly seems as if Cockroach has chosen you, and made sure there was no mistaking it. It seems to me that Cockroach would be a very powerful ally. They can go places humans can't, they are fast, and almost indestructible. Yours seems to be a trickster with an unorthodox sense of humor, which certainly fits for you. Cockroaches will survive a nuclear holocaust. Stags and wolves probably won't. I think Cockroach is a very powerful ally.
Date:September 27th, 2004 11:24 am (UTC)
Sounds...interesting. A #########...that would scare me. I'd have to keep myself from squashing it.
Date:September 27th, 2004 11:24 am (UTC)
Dear god. My computer blocks the word c_ockroach. That's very, very sad. O_O
(Deleted comment)
Date:September 27th, 2004 08:27 pm (UTC)
Hmm...could it? LOL It lets me say lesbians, but not the singular form.

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