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January 4th, 2005


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08:27 am - Tsunami, etc.
I admit. Like fred_smith, I have trouble conceptualizing the Tsunami. I feel disconnected. Obviously, I'm supposed to feel something. Hell, everyone reading this journal seems to be sickened, saddened, or stupified by the thing. About the only "S" word I haven't seen is "sleezy". I think I'm happy that no one feels "sleezy" about the Tsunami.

I gave up worrying about it, though. I don't think it's a failing as a human being. I don't think I'm less of a person. Heck, I don't even think that I'm expected to feel bad about the whole thing.

Is it because I didn't lose a loved one? Is it because I have a really dark sense of humour? Is it because I still haven't mailed out Christmas cards? Is it because I secretly think that these people were dirty and unwashed and could use a good bath? Is it because I'm actually a Republican?

I don't think it's any of those reasons, but then, I'm not known for understanding things.

In the end, I tried to care. I really did. I looked at the pictures, watched the news, and whistled a low whistle at the numbers, shaking my head at the initial offer of $35M of aid. I had all the outward signs of a genuinely caring person. Yet try as I might to care, I failed miserably.

What was my first thought when I heard about the earthquake? "Isn't that near Krakatoa? I'd like to visit there someday." What about when I heard about the tidalwave? "Didn't they expect that?"

I'm sorry, my friends. I just don't feel it.

Think of me what you must.
Current Mood: hopefulLookin' up.
Current Music: "Little Egypt", -JB

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[User Picture]
From:hearthstone
Date:January 4th, 2005 05:33 pm (UTC)
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I wouldn't say that I've grieved, either--been shocked and saddened, yes, but not grieved. We had our holidays, celebrated the new year, focused on our own concerns. It's just so big, so unimaginable, that you can't really understand it--maybe the brain stops trying after a while. Maybe it's also the distance or the fact that it wasn't a direct personal loss, and maybe that does make me a hard person in some ways, I don't know. Might also be that I haven't been following the story in depth--I've checked headlines on Yahoo, but I haven't had CNN on in weeks--so I've missed a lot of detail that other folks have been seeing. Could be a lot of things, but I don't think the main one is me not being a nice person, at least I hope not. I think that different people respond to different things...differently.

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