January 4th, 2005
|08:27 am - Tsunami, etc.|
I admit. Like fred_smith, I have trouble conceptualizing the Tsunami. I feel disconnected. Obviously, I'm supposed to feel something. Hell, everyone reading this journal seems to be sickened, saddened, or stupified by the thing. About the only "S" word I haven't seen is "sleezy". I think I'm happy that no one feels "sleezy" about the Tsunami.
I gave up worrying about it, though. I don't think it's a failing as a human being. I don't think I'm less of a person. Heck, I don't even think that I'm expected to feel bad about the whole thing.
Is it because I didn't lose a loved one? Is it because I have a really dark sense of humour? Is it because I still haven't mailed out Christmas cards? Is it because I secretly think that these people were dirty and unwashed and could use a good bath? Is it because I'm actually a Republican?
I don't think it's any of those reasons, but then, I'm not known for understanding things.
In the end, I tried to care. I really did. I looked at the pictures, watched the news, and whistled a low whistle at the numbers, shaking my head at the initial offer of $35M of aid. I had all the outward signs of a genuinely caring person. Yet try as I might to care, I failed miserably.
What was my first thought when I heard about the earthquake? "Isn't that near Krakatoa? I'd like to visit there someday." What about when I heard about the tidalwave? "Didn't they expect that?"
I'm sorry, my friends. I just don't feel it.
Think of me what you must.
Current Mood: Lookin' up.
Current Music: "Little Egypt", -JB
Well it is unfortunate that you can't feel sadness; your capacity for joy is directly tied to your capacity for sorrow. Emotion is emotion. But do I scorn you? No. If you have never experienced tragic loss how you can be expected to understand what it is like?
When I was a child and teenager, I remember feeling guilty because I didn't feel sorrow when my best friend's grandmother died. But then people I loved started to die and I knew. And now when someone dies, I know what is feels like lose someone forever and I can empathize.
It's helpful that I have just come out of an ecology class where we spent considerable time studying the environmental problems of the third world. The second I heard about this tragedy, I realized how big of an impact it was going to have--because I knew about the lack of infrastructure and wealth in the region.
I think it is worth making an effort to get your head around chronarchy
around this tragedy I mean. Hopefully you have your head around yourself.