1.where would you most prefer to be stabbed with a short sword?
Hm. . . Anywhere except the stomach or groin. Maybe the left arm, since that wouldn't impare my ability to crack their skull with my right arm in retaliation.
2.a long sword? (just kidding)
real 2.blonde, brunette, or redhead?
Redhead, all the way. I like darker, more auburn hair best. I tend to find black hair boring, brunettes look mousy, and blondes have never really impressed me.
On an interesting (and even slightly related) side-note, one of my friends told me I have to watch out for redheads because they tend to balloon out as they get older. I don't think I buy that. . .
5.if a pirate were to issue you an ultimatum: walk the plank and take your chance with the sharks or join him on the high seas pillaging and raping (consentually) young wenches, what would you choose?
Well, let's see. . . Death, or booty. . . Death, or adventure. . . Death, or wenching. . . ? You'll forgive me if I don't see the *choice* inherent in this? Let it be said that, while I'm not really interested in life on the high seas, I'm very interested in any employment venue where I might get to go a-wenching.
17.try to imagine nothing. what does it look like?
Amusingly, when I first heard that there was "nothing" outside the universe, I connected this with God, who also hung out "outside" the universe. So I imagined this big, old, white, bearded guy standing in blackness and looking at a globe that was the universe. Then I realized that "nothing" wouldn't look black, because black is "something".
Amazingly, I have a conception of what "nothing" would look like. It's impossible to describe, though, because once you start describing it, it becomes "something". Suffice it to say, it looks like what is outside the universe.
4 1/3. what condiment would you prefer to bathe in?
Something tasty, I think. Honey would be the best bet. Not only is it a natural antibiotic, meaning I'd actually get clean, it'd be fun to invite someone to lick it off :)
Ketchup, horseradish, mustard, and that stuff they put on chillie dogs just aren't as sexy as honey. :)