September 2nd, 2005


Waking up, as if it's a dream

I've spent the past couple of days in and out of funks, but am now mostly out of them.

Alternatively, I regret and am happy with the posting I made about Summerland, but am now mostly happy about it.

I have been replying to some emails, but not all, but am now mostly replying to all emails.

I slept last night on the couch. I was really too tired to move after the movie I watched with singingwren. She's been staying with Tina and me for the past two nights while she's been homeless. For those who wonder why she hasn't posted an elaborate LJ entry, that's why.

The Summeland post was more of a long rant. It was cleansing. It broke out a lot of pent up issues from the previous weekend. It was painful to write and painful to post, and I've been informed that it was painful to read. But gods, I needed everything in there.

I called healing_coyote on Wednesday and spoke with her yesterday during work for a few minutes. That helped my situation. But then, it's always helped when I've talked to her. I was amused, when speaking with her, that today is one of those wierd astrology dates I should watch out for, according to chirael. He noted in a pair of comments that something crazy was likely to happen on or around this date. He's been (paritally) right before, so I suppose that this near hit is also pretty on-target. A bunch of near hits, I suppose, make one bullseye. Sure, today I can believe in astrology. Why not?

Wednesday night I spent preparing for the main ritual at Summerset this weekend. I really think that this ritual will go well, which is a strange feeling for me. In general, I feel that any ritual I do will go poorly, for as optomistic as I usually am, I'm terribly pessimistic about my abilities as a ritual leader.

But I felt really, really good on Wed. night. I left work early to clear my head and managed to get all sorts of things set up and ready to go, went shopping for new ritual items, and I'm now quite prepared for the weekend, with one minor snag: I don't have any torches. But I spent the evening with both singingwren and Tina. I'm not quite sure how to convey how much just being around them helped.

Today, I'm a bit foggy and a tad tired. It's been a long week for me. I'm trying to get back on board. I look forward to this next festival being over and done with. I need a break, badly.