May 18th, 2005
|01:03 pm - Beyond the Wall of Sleep, Part I|
I hit the wall.
I was suddenly flat against it, nowhere to go, pushed beyond my normal awareness by an unseen hand.
Painfully, I felt myself pressed into the wall, my bones pinching my skin, my face distorted, my eyes being forced shut.
Here was the wall of sleep.
And here was my choice.
I could give in, stop my struggles against the wall I had hit. I could let my eyes shut, feel my body go limp against the wall. I could drop all resistance.
Or I could look to the place beyond it.
There is no backing away from the wall when you finally hit it. It bears you down, smothers you and holds you.
But you can use its strength, as well. You can propell yourself through to the other side. Beyond the wall.
And I made that choice.
I pushed through.
The wall fell away, breaking into pieces of brick and mortar. As the sleep exhaustion fell away, I stepped through into a new level of consciousness. I found a sudden sharpness of mind that was new and yet familiar.
The world beyond this wall is sharp and clear, never lacking in perception. It feels like a dream, and yet it has an amazing reality about it.
Current Mood: accomplished
Current Music: "The Wind Cries Mary", -JB
Quite. . . If your definition of "fun" involves talking about exhaustion, sleep, sex, death, and reality.
Sound like your cup 'o meat?
You have to ask her that?