Log in

No account? Create an account

> Recent Entries
> Archive
> Friends
> Profile
> Chronarchy.com

Ár nDraíocht Féin
Three Cranes
Chaos Matrix

September 2nd, 2005

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
08:50 am - Waking up, as if it's a dream
I've spent the past couple of days in and out of funks, but am now mostly out of them.

Alternatively, I regret and am happy with the posting I made about Summerland, but am now mostly happy about it.

I have been replying to some emails, but not all, but am now mostly replying to all emails.

I slept last night on the couch. I was really too tired to move after the movie I watched with singingwren. She's been staying with Tina and me for the past two nights while she's been homeless. For those who wonder why she hasn't posted an elaborate LJ entry, that's why.

The Summeland post was more of a long rant. It was cleansing. It broke out a lot of pent up issues from the previous weekend. It was painful to write and painful to post, and I've been informed that it was painful to read. But gods, I needed everything in there.

I called healing_coyote on Wednesday and spoke with her yesterday during work for a few minutes. That helped my situation. But then, it's always helped when I've talked to her. I was amused, when speaking with her, that today is one of those wierd astrology dates I should watch out for, according to chirael. He noted in a pair of comments that something crazy was likely to happen on or around this date. He's been (paritally) right before, so I suppose that this near hit is also pretty on-target. A bunch of near hits, I suppose, make one bullseye. Sure, today I can believe in astrology. Why not?

Wednesday night I spent preparing for the main ritual at Summerset this weekend. I really think that this ritual will go well, which is a strange feeling for me. In general, I feel that any ritual I do will go poorly, for as optomistic as I usually am, I'm terribly pessimistic about my abilities as a ritual leader.

But I felt really, really good on Wed. night. I left work early to clear my head and managed to get all sorts of things set up and ready to go, went shopping for new ritual items, and I'm now quite prepared for the weekend, with one minor snag: I don't have any torches. But I spent the evening with both singingwren and Tina. I'm not quite sure how to convey how much just being around them helped.

Today, I'm a bit foggy and a tad tired. It's been a long week for me. I'm trying to get back on board. I look forward to this next festival being over and done with. I need a break, badly.
Current Mood: exhaustedexhausted
Current Music: "Buttermilk Grove", -JB

(10 comments Leave a comment)


Date:September 2nd, 2005 08:41 pm (UTC)
I will agree that you post on summerland had some painful overtones, but I think it was very cathartic for ya.

I'm glad you have Anna around too, that girl can carry sunshine into a room.

hang in there
[User Picture]
Date:September 6th, 2005 01:19 pm (UTC)
She can :)
Date:September 4th, 2005 01:49 am (UTC)
always glad to help!
[User Picture]
Date:September 6th, 2005 01:19 pm (UTC)
And you always do.
[User Picture]
Date:September 6th, 2005 12:22 am (UTC)
Thank you both SO much. It really meant a lot to me. Not only did you extend your hospitality, but you both extended your awesome friendship. I felt at home, truly, and it is very hard to make me feel that way (although sometimes I say it more often than I mean.)

I can't even explain why, but coming back to your place to that loud music and silliness and packing up for a ritual just really filled up a part of me I hadn't realized was empty. Maybe it's just because I've been living alone for so long that I forgot what it was like to go somehwere where you can make big messes and crank up your music and generally RELAX for a while. No worries about strangers or strangers from the ghetto looking in your window or anything... awesome.

It must be really nice to come home to YOUR house and be able to kick off your shoes, cook dinner, take care of whatever needs to be done on your own time, watch the news on TV, etc, and neither be alone nor crowded. You know who will be there when you go back, more often than not. And you have somebody to watch Firefly with and laugh with and all of that... yep, it must be good times.

In fact, I KNOW it's good times because you two let me be a part of that. I was very worried about being an intruder or making it difficult for you to relax (I know that Hospitality requires lots of effort :)) but if I did worry you you sure did a good job hiding it! I was in a radiant mood for a long time afterward, just because you both stayed up too late watching Firefly and laughing to the point of tears about that ridiculous zombie mascot with me. And you fed me well and set me up well... che, I am so grateful! If there's anything I can do in return, please let me know. And please thank Tina a whole bunch for me again.

A+ for hospitality. I hope I was a gracious guest!
[User Picture]
Date:September 6th, 2005 01:20 pm (UTC)
Thank you. Forwarded comments on to Tina.
Date:September 9th, 2005 02:27 pm (UTC)
Never regret speaking the truth, even if it's painful.
[User Picture]
Date:September 12th, 2005 07:26 pm (UTC)
I was amused... that today is one of those wierd astrology dates I should watch out for, according to Chirael. He noted in a pair of comments that something crazy was likely to happen on or around this date.

In hindsight, of course, it's now obvious that the 9/2 date corresponds pretty closely to your experience at Summerland and after. Having never been to Summerland, though, it never even occurred to me when making the original comments.

You'll have to let me/us know what, if anything, happens around the 17th/18th (the Full Moon).

You must be playing Zelda on the Game Boy Advance, on which I guess it was re-released. Bummer, I'd hoped it was released as open source or some other kind of free emulator type thing.

OTOH, I probably don't need another thing to get sucked into, least of all a game I was sucked into back in jr. high school. But I am enjoying the music from Castlevania available on the Classic NES site.

I just wish they had more tracks and they were downloadable, because each game had such great music. The music really set the tone for those games and made them such wonderful worlds to get lost in.

I did love Castlevania though. Not only was it a cool game, but I of course loved the occult (if cheesily pop-culture) elements in it, too. I'm disappointed not to see Kid Icarus on the site, but I'm sure everyone has games they wished were available but aren't.
[User Picture]
Date:September 12th, 2005 07:34 pm (UTC)
I'll certainly be noting what (if anything) occurs on the 18th or around it. It's amusing me to no end how it matches up. Roughly, at least.

Actually, it's an original Zelda release, on the original console.

However, I do have an emulator and the game if you change your mind. . .

Castlevania was a great game. I have Simon's Quest on the nintendo, but I wish I still had Castlevania 3, as well. Instead, I traded it for Megaman 3 back in the day. Ah, to have that trade back.
[User Picture]
Date:September 12th, 2005 07:37 pm (UTC)
I should have done more research before posting. I searched for "classic nes games music download" and found several cool sites including this one which has a ton of downloadable MIDI game files including several remixes.

I miss downloadable music like Napster. Not because I wanted to steal whole albums from artists (never did that, actually), but because by doing simple searches for things like "The Orb" I could find awesome remixes and new stuff (like Boards of Canada, Massive Attack, and Goldfrapp) that I probably would have never stumbled across otherwise.

Anyway, enough meaningless rambling for one day.

> Go to Top