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Ár nDraíocht Féin
Three Cranes
Chaos Matrix

September 22nd, 2005

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10:37 am - Lifting Up the Shards
I've come up with something, a chaos working to deal with certain things in my life.

The problem is, as I plan it, it's becoming more and more clear just how dangerous it is to me personally, and my mental health in particular.

While I admit that it's quite terrifying to think about the implications of it, the possibilities and potential for growth are simply amazing.

The issue, of course, is method. How do I get where I need to go? TOPY would tell me the obvious: "See a cliff, jump off."

There is a lot of work left to do before I decide if this is something I can do, or even need to do.

I promise: there are no tentacles involved. Well, I can't say that there won't be, but I'm certainly not planning any. This is a totally different paradigm.

On a side note, I had an encounter with Eris' mother the other day, and I have a new presentation in the works for PSA or an ADF festival.

Poll #575329 Poll 9: Directions

What should be my single most central concern?

Personal growth
Making sure the shit don't spatter on others
Personal safety.
Avoiding tentacles
Containment: CM workings should only affect the Chaote.
Jumping off the cliff.
Personal sanity.
Doing what needs to be done.
Getting back what has been lost.

Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: "Burn That Bridge", -JB

(29 comments Leave a comment)


Date:September 22nd, 2005 02:49 pm (UTC)
TOPY's wisdom is... well. wise, I guess. But I have noticed a tendency in their magical journals to perhaps go too far. Balance is needed.

Oh, and whats the deal with containment?
[User Picture]
Date:September 22nd, 2005 02:54 pm (UTC)
Mostly, I'm curious about how many people think that should be a primary concern when I do these things. No one has really *asked* me to contain, but I figured that it was worth looking into.

I agree, though, on TOPY sometimes going a bit too far, and that balance is something very useful. I'm approaching this thing very cautiously, and the more I think about it, the more complicated it becomes. Had I jumped into it already (certainly a possibility at this point, as I have everything I need to make that jump), I think it would have been a bad idea.

Then again, I think that such a jump could also be very beneficial, so I'm keeping that open as an option, even if it is unlikely that I will take that route.

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