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Ár nDraíocht Féin
Three Cranes
Chaos Matrix

September 22nd, 2005

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10:37 am - Lifting Up the Shards
I've come up with something, a chaos working to deal with certain things in my life.

The problem is, as I plan it, it's becoming more and more clear just how dangerous it is to me personally, and my mental health in particular.

While I admit that it's quite terrifying to think about the implications of it, the possibilities and potential for growth are simply amazing.

The issue, of course, is method. How do I get where I need to go? TOPY would tell me the obvious: "See a cliff, jump off."

There is a lot of work left to do before I decide if this is something I can do, or even need to do.

I promise: there are no tentacles involved. Well, I can't say that there won't be, but I'm certainly not planning any. This is a totally different paradigm.

On a side note, I had an encounter with Eris' mother the other day, and I have a new presentation in the works for PSA or an ADF festival.

Poll #575329 Poll 9: Directions

What should be my single most central concern?

Personal growth
Making sure the shit don't spatter on others
Personal safety.
Avoiding tentacles
Containment: CM workings should only affect the Chaote.
Jumping off the cliff.
Personal sanity.
Doing what needs to be done.
Getting back what has been lost.

Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: "Burn That Bridge", -JB

(29 comments Leave a comment)


[User Picture]
Date:September 22nd, 2005 04:57 pm (UTC)
I say jump.

You appear, to me, to have spent lots of time working on your Belief System, your rituals, your tools etc. Either those things are in place and useful to you, or their not... While I might recommend a quick safty check, I think you may need to jump and trust your training.

Besides, whats the worst that could happen? You might go crazy and start talking about having old greek goddesses paying you visits.


[User Picture]
Date:September 22nd, 2005 05:02 pm (UTC)
PS: I recommend:

1) Watchful Servitor to keep you somewhat safe.
2) Someone on hand to lead you through banishing rituals if things get out of hand.

I had one experience with an invocation where the person simply couldn't get back to ground and we walked him through the LBRP and Kabbalistic Cross over and over untill he could get back and perform it himself. Dunno if it matters or not, but it seemed useful that time.

Otherwise, consider that the Psychonaut sometime appears best suited to dive in and trust their equipment. So check the regulator, make sure you have a full tank of oxygen, clear your mask and dive.

Ratatosk, Squirrel of Discord
[User Picture]
Date:September 22nd, 2005 07:22 pm (UTC)
duly noted. Thanks.
[User Picture]
Date:September 22nd, 2005 07:23 pm (UTC)
There are worse things. You'll see what I mean when I write up the cosmology around this working.

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