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A pocket full of gold coins. . . - Chronarchy

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October 26th, 2006


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05:36 pm - A pocket full of gold coins. . .
Today, I found myself with a pocket full of gold coins.

(This often happens when one leaves the post office.)

A sneaky, mischevious grin tugged at the corners of my mouth and sparkled in my eye as I left, though, because I could think only one thought:

"I am a Chaote, and I have a pocket full of gold coins."

My question to you all, all the people on my flist, is this:

"If you were a Chaote, and you had a pocket full of gold coins, what would you do?"

I'd make it a poll, but something tells me some answers might be longer than 255 characters. . .

(feel free to tell me, too, if this scene seems as . . . dangerous/mischevious/frightening to you as it does to me)
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: "Presents to Send You", -JB

(28 comments Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:tesinth
Date:October 26th, 2006 05:50 pm (UTC)
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My favorite use for such coins is to leave them for tips when you eat out. You can leave a really lousy tip, less then 10% even, but many servers think the coins are so cool that they don't do the math. /only do this if you get lousy service, of course

Another idea that pops into my head is that, if you arrive before your coworkers, leave one on the seat of a random coworker each day for a week or so, let them try to rationalize any reason for them.
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:52 pm (UTC)
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Both good ideas. I was already thinking about using them for tips, so good to know we're on the same page :)

And #2 there reminds me of the paperclip curse.
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 06:08 pm (UTC)
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I, too, had serious thoughts of the leprechaun variety. I have the jacket (note: usericon), but I'm a bit. . . tall. . .

I should obtain a friend who is about 4.5' tall for this express purpose.
[User Picture]
From:tesinth
Date:October 26th, 2006 06:20 pm (UTC)
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You could still dress up as a leprechaun, and if any one argues about your height, start crying and yelling (with a thick accent, of course) about the perils of being a leprechaun with Pituitary Gigantism.
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:10 pm (UTC)
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"Aye, ye'd be thinkin' I was too tall, ye goat-sucking English spawn! And what, may I ask, is the proper size for a leprechaun? Ye certainly don' be lookin' like ye've found a pot 'o gold recently, in yer raggedy rags and yer rough hands.

Eet's me curse! All the other Leprechauns laugh at me, too! No gold for ye, ya bastard!"

Then I should pull out a lighter and a smoke bomb and "disappear" by running away in the "concealing" smoke.
[User Picture]
From:prophet_maid
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:32 pm (UTC)
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Just import Sharon, she's short enough :)

(Sorry hun, had to throw that in.)
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:06 pm (UTC)
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The question is, what are the legal penalties for smuggling Sharons across the OH-PA border?
[User Picture]
From:smithing_chick
Date:October 27th, 2006 05:40 am (UTC)
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Not being a controled substance of any sort, I don't think there are any penalties.

However, I'm fairly certain your jacket won't fit me. ;-)
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 27th, 2006 01:48 pm (UTC)
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Oh, I dunno. It might. :) It's a thrift-store-second-hand deal. . . I love it.
(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:01 pm (UTC)
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Hadn't thought of that. . . Hmm . . .

I wonder how she'd look in my jacket?

She's lacking facial hair, though. That could be off-putting. I wonder if there are any legends about girl leprechauns?
[User Picture]
From:nontacitare
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:09 pm (UTC)
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There aren't any Irish legends about girl leprechauns, but, well, someone had to make the boy ones. My theory - girl leprechauns are just too clever to be captured. ;-)
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:15 pm (UTC)
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A good theory, but given that it seems to be a patriarchal culture, what with the boy leprechauns out there with all the money, they might also not be caught because they're barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.

Conversely, they might be a matriarchy, because the men have these huge pots of gold, and if we know anything about male behavior, we know that men who have large sums of money spend it on strippers and blow. Thus, the fact that they are actually *saving* it and *hiding* it indicates that the women are firmly in control of their actions, so I would say it's likely that the women are not being caught because they're busy running megacorporations and enjoying margaritas in Tahiti while the men lug the bank account from rainbow to rainbow like slaves.
[User Picture]
From:raydon_12
Date:October 26th, 2006 06:07 pm (UTC)
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Many moons ago when I was still a happy, care free and broke student I'd save up all my change all through the semester. Towards finals I'd count up and carefully roll the coins, then order a pizza!! Only one delivery person actually insisted on unrolling and counting the stack. Of course, knowing that I was being very silly, I tipped them very well when I did this. With the escalating price of a delivered pizza these days, even with the gold dollars that'd be a nice handfull of coins. Enjoy!!!
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:03 pm (UTC)
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"Pick up or delivery?"

"Delivery."

"What would you like?"

"A large Cheese and Pep, please."

"Any specials?"

"No thanks."

"The total comes to $16 with delivery. How will you be paying, cash or charge?"

"Pocket full of gold coins."

"Um. . . Drivers carry less than $20 in change. Delivery time is 45 minutes."

"Thank you!"
[User Picture]
From:raydon_12
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:08 pm (UTC)
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Yup!! that sounds about right!! What'll be really fun is if you get some high school kid with his pants hanging around his knees and he tries to put the coins in his pickets!!!!

of course, thats a scene that could lead to loosing one's apetite....hhmmmmm
[User Picture]
From:wishesofastar
Date:October 27th, 2006 01:38 am (UTC)
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Holy hell, where are you ordering from that a large pizza costs $16? I've never paid more than $12.
[User Picture]
From:maugorn
Date:October 26th, 2006 06:48 pm (UTC)
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(By way of intro, I am a Pope of Eris from the DC area and followed a link to your story of visiting Her City in Ohio, and then couldn't resist adding your journal to my list)

You could hand them to known enemies and adversaries and say "Eris Bless You!"

Personally, as much as I love the gold coins, the Suzy B's were even more lucrative. Since they were about the size and shape of and color of quarters, they were much fun for this trick back in 'the day':

Our local paper, the Washington Post used to cost 25c which meant that with tax they were 26c at the convenience store. For hilarious results, one gets a paper, goes to the register, fishes out the dollar coin and places it on the counter. If the clerk is slow, they sit and wait for a penny, while you wait for your change. The awkward moment could just go on and on...
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:53 pm (UTC)
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Yes, I was thinking about the wonders of the SBA dollars just today.

Oh, such awkward moments: the world is made of them!

And welcome to the journal. Always fun, and you'll find some curious persons here: everyone fits right in.
[User Picture]
From:singingwren
Date:October 26th, 2006 06:50 pm (UTC)
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I would buy myself a stairway to heaven. And dance all the way up, only to stop just in front of heaven and yell "PSYCHE! I never believed in you ANYWAY!"

You should also keep one on you at all times if you have that luxury: they make an excellent toll for troll bridges, and nobody wants to get eaten by a troll because they're a chump and spent all their money on heaven.
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:55 pm (UTC)
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Always keep your kit with you: candles, chalk, incense, silver knife, thuggee knife, service revolver, garlic, Yellow Sign, cabfare, condoms, and change.

This would be the "change" portion.
[User Picture]
From:gypsydove
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:34 pm (UTC)
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I would go, dressed as a gypsy of course... dancing throughout the market square...and toss coins to a chosen few people... and if they didn't acknowledge my gift...then I would hackle...look crazy...and say some gibberish at the top of my lungs at them... go grab the coin back (if it on e the floor) and offer it to a deserving child...

yeap yeap yeap...
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 26th, 2006 07:59 pm (UTC)
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Must. . . find. . . market. . . square. . .
[User Picture]
From:gypsydove
Date:October 26th, 2006 08:06 pm (UTC)
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to see....

-or-

to do....

or is that a question of the same....
[User Picture]
From:romandruid
Date:October 26th, 2006 11:04 pm (UTC)
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*shakes head* WWJD?
[User Picture]
From:garan_du
Date:October 26th, 2006 11:28 pm (UTC)
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I'd figure out a way to turn those stupid Sacagaweas into real dollars.
From:ceolnamara
Date:October 27th, 2006 01:46 am (UTC)
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Quite obviously, I would take them and buy an Audi.

Afterwards, I'd fly back to America and go to Wendy's and then fly back to school.

I freaking need Wendy's, man.

Or, if the gold coins were magical enough, I would just manifest my Wendy's right here.
From:episkopos
Date:October 27th, 2006 08:06 am (UTC)
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If the darn things actually fit into vending machines and other devices with coin slots, I suggest you deface them in some manner (In Eris We Trust?) and place them into said slots. Keep 'em circulating. Like fnorded dollars.

Alternatively, offer them to passers-by in exchange for a story. That's always sweet.
[User Picture]
From:chronarchy
Date:October 27th, 2006 02:00 pm (UTC)
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Oh, they'll fit.

It's just that nothing else will fit when they get stuck.

I wonder if I have the proper tools to deface a coin?

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