January 4th, 2007
|03:59 pm - Steps to a better life:|
Today's excursion into entirely different modes of experiencing communication was nigh disastrous.
- Step 1: Learn ASL for "Can I buy you a cup of coffee?"
- Step 2: ?
- Step 3: Profit!
Thankfully, there was a cute girl sitting next to me who kinda knew what she was doing, and was willing to help me out.
I'm in over my head with the ASL stuff, but the Chaote is kicking in.
If that little bastard weren't so rusty at existence, I might stand a chance at acing this course.
As it stands, I walked out repeating, "I will not be frightened by the fact that I can't keep up with a girl on the first day of class. I will not give in to frustration. I am not here for me. I am here for my Grove, ADF, and my co-workers. If no one sees me for ten weeks, they can deal with that."
And in a little voice at the back of my head, I was repeating something deeper and more ingrained:
I must not fear.Then I turned around and looked back at Mendenhall Lab and the girl caught my eye and waved. And damnit, there I was feeling in-over-my-head again.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Sail On Sailor", -JB
Hehe. I think, on further reflection, that there are persons that I consider "men" and "women" outside my immediate family: these are people that I have professional relationships with: they come to my office, or I know them superficially, or I think of them as without emotion or wonder.
If there is any relationship beyond that, be it emotional, romantic, friendly, or intellectual, then they're a "guy" or a "girl".
I think "boy" probably connotes "young" to me, but honestly, this is probably a function of the alliterative aspects of "guys and girls" over the non-alliterative aspects of "boys and girls". I am thus more likely to use "guy" when referring to a male friend with whom I have a relationship more than superficial with that I am to use "boy".
I will occasionally use "gal" in place of "girl", which is the obvious counterpart of "guy", but I spent so much time breaking my usage of that word because I had to fit myself into a Yankee school district that I can barely think in those terms anymore.
(and people think I just say shit willy-nilly sometimes. . . I know what I'm doing. Sorta. Kinda. Okay: I'm making it up as I go along. But at least I can defend it!)
Gah. My brain hurts now.
As long as I'm the queen and you're captain of the guard, it's all good.
See, challenging my word choice doesn't benefit anyone. :)
I never challenge anything you say/do. I am of the opinion that doing such is not within my job description.
but it is ever so much fun and does yield good conversation and a new way of looking at things :)
i'm not sure but i think poking fun at you IS part of my job description, but i'll have to check the by-laws under "scribe" :) i think roadtripjudi
will back me on that...