April 27th, 2007
|11:01 am - Wondering Why We Ever Go Home: Greece, 2007|
Journal Entry 3
A Night of Bad Dreams and Little Sleep
Last night, after a good evening of talking after yesterday's trips, I found myself unable to sleep. there were a lot of thoughts moving through my head all night, from ADF issues to work problems to women. And of course, last night's little discussion of love for a goddess.Heh. The music playing as I post this is sillilly apropos.
But I woke up several times last night after I finally fell asleep, each time because of a different problem. It was the last problem I found myself most worried about.
Well, not "worried." More like "baffled."
In my dream this morning, which was actually a half-awake musing after I was awakened by zylch's alarm clock, I was hanging out with a girl When I saw her, I leaned in to give her a hug, and she pulled away, hard. I was confused.
"I'm not going to kiss you," she said.
"Fuck," I said. "If I wanted to kiss you, I'd ask you on a date first, and probably ask if I could kiss you. My heart's been broken too many times for me to try and pull a shitty stunt like that. Now, can I have a hug?"
And, of course, the rest of the dream has us wandering about a bookstore like old friends, but something has changed. She is no longer as close, no longer as flirty, and now, where there was nothing between us, there is embarrassment and suspicion.
And that simple fact breaks my heart again.
I've never been good with love, it seems.
Other highlights of my restless morning include watching the sunrise through the windows (more correctly, watching the sun's light increase) and having an argument over whether to get up and do a devotional to Usas (I decided not to because I needed the sleep so badly), worrying about ADF elections (very common), and enjoying thoughts about women (not like that, no). (well, maybe just a bit)
Oh, and I saw a ghost. Well, it was probably another guest at the house, but without my contacts in and in the bare moonlight coming in our small windows, it sure looked like a ghost. And since house ghosts are more exciting than house guests, I'm saying it was a ghost.
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: "Burn That Bridge", -JB
Quit your bellyaching you punkass bitch. ;P
What's up with you always trippin' on me, biatch?
Who you calling a biatch, that some whacked out shit! I be trippin' cuz I be the only one that can: I wear my suit inside out.
Your suit may be inside out, but youze all inverted, don't you say? You be wackin' out all the shit and smackin' the asses of the homies who love ya.
Youze alwayz steppin', biatch. Alwayz steppin'!
If I be steppin', it be all over you with theeze high heels.
You such a punkass you eat pancakes for lunch.
Now don'tbe frontin', youse know I be all up in you with my inverted bling.
You so punkass yo' momma feeds you crackers for breakfast, and slaps you wit' a tuna if you complain!
Youz gotz da bling, invert, but it's no match fo' my poppin' postings!
Whaaa! Why you be frontin' scrub? 'Least my pops ain't got no skanky hos beatin' me down.
You jist wantin' and jealous of my made skills. Ain't no one else be able to smack you 'round biatch.
P.S. I think I gave you the STD of typoitis as your post has a few typos in it. :P
afraid. so afraid.
Miss you both!
|Date:||April 27th, 2007 05:23 pm (UTC)|| |
and she pulled away, hard. I was confused.
Welcome to my world, my friend. :)
Wow. . . it's spacious in here!
|Date:||April 27th, 2007 07:23 pm (UTC)|| |
Like the wainscoting? I put it up last week. But the fluorescent orange paint really pulls the place together. :)
Amazing what a little love can do to a room, isn't it?
Hey, is that a light over the grill?
|Date:||April 27th, 2007 08:25 pm (UTC)|| |
Buddy, there's lights over BOTH grills!
(and both grills work too!)
/still at work...
|Date:||April 27th, 2007 05:28 pm (UTC)|| |
I've never been good with love, it seems.
Hmm. In the time I've known you your record has coincided with mine to a scary extent. Which means as far as I'm concerned you and Maggie MUST NOT split up unless you work some magic to remove that link.
Duly noted. If it happens, you'll get a text message with a mantra that you must say "Now, now, immediately, immediately, immediately!" in order to avoid similar misfortune.
Hearing about that dream reminds me of the very strange dream I had that night: wherein I was not invited to a party based around pie & was repeatedly told that the baby with whom I was pregnant with in the dream was not the product of the person who I knew was intimately involved in it's creation, &
the only way the paternity was resolved was when ferrelux
was in a corner filming the dude telling someone else that it was his & that he didn't care.
My dreams are just freakish.
I mean, who wouldn't invite me to a party with pie?
Seriously, though ... What do ghosts look like? And did you ever find your myrtle branch?
I read that as myrtle beach instead of branch. Which naturally left me wondering about how exactly one could lose an entire beach.
They fit in your pocket. Until you get wet, at which point they sort of drip down your leg, eroding all the way.
It's just not an appetizing way to carry them, all told.
But no, I didn't find any myrtle.
Pocket beaches. Interesting concept. Not sure if I like the dripping down the leg part though...
LOL. Well, I think it can be done. The number of things I've misplaced can attest to that :-)
Ghosts, as I saw the one I did, look like large, fuzzy white shapes. Probably about a yard and a half in diameter, though they're kinda elliptical, rather than circular. There were definite appendages, but they weren't very clear. And the movement was very fluid.
It began on the right, near peaceful_fox
's room, and them moved off to the left, stopping in front of visioluxus
's room. There, it disappeared, as if it went into the room, but no door was heard to open. A moment later, it reappeared, and moved back to the right. There, also, it disappeared into the room without making the sound of a door opening, and then reappeared a moment later.
It moved back to the left, and I lost it.
I'd invite you to a party with pie. Any day.
Neat. Thanks for sharing.
Excellent about the pie-party thing. Good to know who you can rely on: Pie is no laughing manner!