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October 24th, 2003


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10:10 am - Shenanigans!
Note: This LJ entry may be very mean, but it's supposed to be funny. And only half serious.

From now on, I'm calling shenanigans on various Pagans and classmates. Examples:

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"The whole of Norse Religion was designed so that it would fall apart when Christianity came along!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (I swear I heard this. And the teacher ran with it! I was too confused to be mortified.)

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"And my great-great-great-grandmother on my mom's side was a witch who was burned at the stake in Salem!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (And the Third-Degree-Granny-Factory in New Forest strikes again. And, just in case it needs to be said, not one person was burned at the stake in Salem. Sorry.)

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"Pagans don't believe that! They believe in a God and Goddess who get married at Beltaine! And that's why Pagans don't marry at Beltaine: it steals the thunder from the God and Goddess!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (If all Pagans everywhere believed anything, we'd be Roman Catholic. As far as marrying on Beltaine: it's not because it steals the thunder from the Wiccan God and Goddess, it's because May 1 is a *very* unlucky day to get married in Ireland, and this stems from the fact that no one got married at Beltaine in the Celtic world. This was actually a time of seperation, when the women left the village. Beltaine was actually the *end* of what MacLeod has termed "marriage season".)

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"America was founded by Judo-Christians."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Not only was this country not founded by Judeo-Christians, but it certainly wasn't founded by Christians karate-chopping their way across the frontier.)

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"I was posessed by the God/dess and s/he told me to sleep with you!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (If a deity told me to sleep with someone, I'd probably ascribe it to the mushrooms rather than the God/dess. Religion tends to be a real convenient way of getting into someone's pants.)

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"My tradition comes from Atlantis! There was this really big eye in this pyramid, and it controled the weather! Oh, and Edgar Cayce predicted it would rise from the ocean in 1953!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Atlantis? Unless they're a Discordian, you know they're just makin' it up. And Cayce was a fruit.)

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"Nine million women. . ."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Reference to the "Burning Times", current estimates sit at about 100,000 - 500,000. ish.)

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"I can conjur a thunderstorm and throw fireballs down the street!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (I mean, come on!)

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"You don't know what you're talking about! On page [insert random number] of Drawing Down the Moon. . ."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Anyone who quotes a page number from DDM is assuming you haven't read it either. It's the old Pagan joke, and I've seen it pulled.)

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"My crystal has the power to heal all the bad things in the world!"

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Maybe I'm biased, but if I see one more person shell out $300 for a crystal and then complain about being on food stamps, welfare, or being "poor", I'm going to scream!)

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"Oral tradition tells us how. . ."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (Yes, Starhawk, I'm looking at you. Don't try to hide. You know you just made up those statistics, traditions, and stories.)

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"Most Pagans (esp. Wiccans) are duotheistic."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (No, they aren't. Duotheism, which some have said is a word made up in order to insult Wiccans, is seriously on the decline. Most Pagans are Polytheists or Henotheists.)

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"The Druids didn't have any women among them." Related: "The Druids and the Druidesses were trained seperate from each other, and had different spheres."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (There were female Druids. They did not fit specific spheres and roles. If you want to believe this sort of crap, read the 21 Lessons of Merlyn.)

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"The Celts were matriarchal."

Proper response: "Shenanigans!" (This should almost be "Bullshit" instead, but I'm too polite for that.)

===

Wow, I think I went on a tirade. This whole thing came up last night. Brian and I were talking about the stupid things we've heard in Religious Studies classes, and then it became stupid things we've heard come from Pagans' mouths. We sort of decided that we should just start calling shenanigans in class when someone said something stupid.
Current Mood: busy
Current Music: "Holiday", -JB

(13 comments Leave a comment)

Comments:


From:freyjasgydhia
Date:October 24th, 2003 02:16 pm (UTC)
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Much thanks on the first one especially! :)
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From:styskel
Date:October 24th, 2003 03:05 pm (UTC)
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what does "calling shenanigans" mean?
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From:chronarchy
Date:October 24th, 2003 03:12 pm (UTC)
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To call someone on false information.

shenanigan: n. 1a) a deceitful trick; and underhanded act. b) remarks intended to deceive; deceit. Often used in the plural. 2a) A playful or mischevious act; a prank. b) mischeif, prankishness. Often used in the plural.

To have someone "call shenanigans" on you is to basically say that you're trying to put one over on another person.

I'm not sure where the term comes from originally, but my guess is an upper midwest area.
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From:autumnfey
Date:October 24th, 2003 03:26 pm (UTC)

Right on!

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I would also like to chime in on the generalization and misleading way that statistical info is presented. I have often read (and here I am guilty of not naming the exact sources) that Paganism (or Wicca) is the fastest growing religion in the US. Now, as a science minded person myself I realize that the statement is in no way quantitative, but highly qualitative. I mean if Wicca grew from 10 documented people to 20 in a year they have doubled!! And hey if they grew to 100 in ten years, oh my Goddess, Wicca has grown by 1000%!!!! That hardly means that it is mainstream or that it will catch up with Christianity any time soon. It could just mean that Wicca has grown from next to nothing to something.
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From:chronarchy
Date:October 24th, 2003 03:56 pm (UTC)
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Similarly, I made the claim at Wellspring that Three Cranes had grown by 700% in one month, and challenged any other Grove in ADF to do the same.

It didn't hurt that everyone expired and we dropped to 1 member (me), and then everyone either renewed or joined. :)

But then, I was doing that in fun, not being completely serious. . . Well, not really. :)
From:moonversion
Date:October 24th, 2003 03:39 pm (UTC)
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Heheh, very funny. :)

Don't forget about monism, if we use the definition of paganism being religions which are not Jewish/Christian/Islamic, most pagans are monistic (example: Hinduism, under this definition would be the largest branch of 'pagans' and they're defined as monistic).

I wonder if anyone claims to be related to the dog from Salem (now Danvers)..... ;)
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From:hearthstone
Date:October 24th, 2003 04:30 pm (UTC)
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Heh. I would have loved to hear the justification for the first one.

Is it really true that duotheism is decreasing? I know it used to be really big with the Cunningham crowd but I don't know a lot of Wiccans (or Wiccan-based pagans) in real life these days.
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From:chronarchy
Date:October 24th, 2003 05:25 pm (UTC)
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Most Wiccans I've met tend to a) dislike the term itself, because they see it as degrading, and b) are polytheistic or henotheistic, rather than duo. Either they believe in deities who are distinctly individual, or they believe in the all-Gods-are-One-Goddess thing.

Starhawk (Reclaiming) and Dianics tend to fall under henotheism, and eclectics tend to fall under polytheists. Gardnerians and Alexandrians are fairly rare nowadays.

At least, such has been my experience. I could be wrong.

But I do se a visible trend to decreasing duotheism.
From:healing_coyote
Date:October 24th, 2003 04:30 pm (UTC)
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wow, that was really funny! I had forgotten about shenanigans! This was the pick-me-up for today!
From:freyjasgydhia
Date:October 24th, 2003 06:22 pm (UTC)
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Of course there are pantheists too...
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From:autumnfey
Date:October 24th, 2003 08:44 pm (UTC)
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I attended a very intersting lecture on religion/feminism/eco-activism where the lecturer spent a good deal of time talking about the pagan/goddess movement (very Starhawk). But she actually brought up a point about pantheism which is probably not widely known outside of religious studies students. I was under the impression that pantheists thought that the divine was all around them, in every thing (people, rocks, animals, plants, etc). And as such I considered myself to be a pantheist. But in truth I am a panentheist. The difference being a pantheist sees everything as divine, and as such, there is not thing as deity, no seperate thing that is just divine. Divinity is the collective divine sparks in everything around us. Now, a panenthiest gets to have her cake and eat it too. For panentheists, there is a piece of the divine in everything around us, but the divine exists outside of and separate from all of that as well. Just thought I'd share . . .
From:freyjasgydhia
Date:October 25th, 2003 02:22 pm (UTC)
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That is a wonderful thing! Thank you for sharing!
:) The more we educate those around us the better off everyone is. If we all keep ourselves open to being educated that is... It's a pleasure to meet you..
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From:drakhuss
Date:October 24th, 2003 11:49 pm (UTC)
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Quoting Eddie Izzard "Well Done" That was fun to read, Go you for keeping things straight. Id Give you some gold stars but I dont know where my sticker sheet is.

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