Chronarchy (chronarchy) wrote,

Discordians on ID, the lost Principia, and the JFK assasination!

Years before Creationism became Intelligent Design and began to fill the heads of our children with unscientific rot that masqueraded as science, Discordians were fighting the good fight against ID with their own myths and stories.

There is a copy of the Principia Discordia in the JFK Collection from the HSCA. It was placed there because one of the founders of Discordianism, Thornley, was investigated as part of the conspiracy to kill JFK (by virtue of having served with Oswald and writing two books on him. . . one of those books being written before the assassination).

It's an old edition, one that contains the myth that was supposed to precede Starbuck's Pebbles in the Principia, but was somehow left out. This edition is something like the Dead Sea Scrolls or the Nag Hammadi library of Discordianism, and I'll bet that very few of you even knew it existed. Honestly, almost no Discordians had ever seen these writings until the HSCA files were declassified in 1992, and it took a few years beyond that for Rev. drjon to dig it out.

Even the title is different. Discordians, of course, know their holy book as "The Principia Discordia: Or, How I Found the Goddess and What I Did To Her When I Found Her". The title of this version of the Principia is, "The Principia Discordia: Or, How the West Was Lost."

For those interested, though, please take a few minutes to peruse the complete scan (minus two pages that simply do not exist) of this original~ish Principia Discordia.


	There once was a huge boulder, perched precariously, on the
edge of a cliff.  For hundreds of years this boulder was there,
rocking and swaying, but always keeping its balance just perfectly.
But one year, there happened to be a sever windstorm; severe enough
it was, to topple the  boulder from its majectic height and dash it
to the bottom cf the cliff, far far below.  Needless to say, the
boulder was smashed into many pieces.  Where it hit, the ground was
covered with a carpet of pebbles--some small and some large--but
pebbles and pebbles and more pebbles for as far as you could walk
in an hour.

	One day, after all this, a young man by the name of Ichabod
happened on the area.  Being a fellow of keen mind and observational
powers, naturally he was quite astounded to see so many stones
scattered so closely on the ground.  Now, Ichabod was very much
interested in the nature of things, and he spent the whole afternoon
looking at pebbles, and measuring the size of pebbles, and feeling
the weight of pebbles, and just pondering about pebbles in general.

	He spent the night there, not wanting to lose this miraculous
find, and awoke the next morning full of enthusiasm.  He spent
many days on his carpet of stones.

	Eventually he noticed a very strange thing.  There were three
rather large stones on the carpet and they formed a triangle--
almost (but not quite) equilateral.  He was amazed.  Looking further
he found four very white stones that were arranged in a lopsided
square.  Then he saw that by disregarding one white stone and
thinking of that grey stone a foot over instead, it was a perfect
square!  And if you chose this stone, and that stone, and that one,
and that one and that one you have a pentagon as large as the tri-
angle.  And here a small hexagon.  And there a square partially
inside of the hexagon.  And a decagon.  And two triangles inter-
locked.  And a circle.  And a smaller circle within the circle.
And a triangle within that which has a red stone, a grey stone and
a white stone.

	Ichabod spent many hours finding many designs that became
more and more complicated as his powers of observation grew with
practice.  Then he began to log his designs in a large leather
book; and as he counted designs and described them, the pages
began to fill as the sun continued to return.

	He had begun his second ledger when a friend came by.  His
friend was a poet and also interested in the nature of things.

	"My friend," cried Ichabod, "come quickly!  I have discovered
the most wonderous thing in the universe."  The poet hurried over
to him, quite anxious to see what it was.

	Ichabod showed him the carpet of stones...but the poet only
laughed and said "It's nothing but scattered rocks!"

	"But look," said Ichabod, 'see this triangle and that [square]
and that and that."  And he proceeded to show his friend the
harvest of his many days study. When the poet saw the designs he
turned to the ledgers and by the time he was finished with these,
he too was overwhelmed.

	He began to write poetry about the marvelous designs.  And as
he wrote and contemplated he became sure that the designs must
mean something.  Such order and beauty is too monumental to be
senseless.  And the designs were there, Ichabod had showed him [that.]

	The poet went back to the village and read his new poetry.
And all who heard him went to the cliff to see first hand the [carpet]
of designs.  And all returned to the village to spread the word.
Then as the enthusiasm grew there developed a group of those who
love beauty and nature, all of whom went to live right at the
Designs themselves.  Together they wanted to see every design that
was there.

	Some wrote ledger about just triangles.  Others described the
circles.  Others concentrated on red colored stones--and they
happened to be the first to see designs springing from outside the
carpet.  They, and some others, saw designs everywhere they went.

	"How blind we have been," they said.

	The movement grew and grew and grew.  And all who could see the
designs knew that they had to have been put there by a Great Force.
"Nothing but a Great Force," said the philosophers, "could create
this immense beauty!"

	"Yes," said the world, "nothing but a god could create such
magnificent order.  Nothing but a God."

	And that was the day that God was born.  And ever since then,
all men have known Him for His infinite power and all men have
loved Him for His infinite wisdom.
Tags: amusement, books, discord, discordia, eris, history, myth

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