March 30th, 2010
|12:13 pm - Closer. . .|
Last weekend, I went out to Highbanks and recorded roughly an hour of myself stumbling over words, hesitating, and trying to keep a fire going while kids played on the squeaky swingset not far away and airplanes made lots of noise. But, after roughly 20 takes (and over half a bottle of hazelnut oil), I had four usable videos for my Theatre for Ritual 1 coursework. You can see it on my website.
The best ones are where I sort of trail off, my eyebrow cocks up, and I pause, just before laying out a small torrent of mild curses and walking off-camera to start over. In one shot in particular, I get so confounded by what I just said that my eyebrows literally "wiggle" in consternation.
The worst ones are where I involuntarily glance over to where the paper with the planned invocations is sitting, knowing full well that I can't read it, and I stare for a moment too long at it before continuing.
I had thought about getting posterboards and putting the invitations (or at least an outline of them) on them, then propping the boards up at various points so I could read them and pretend to be looking around, but I settled on the intent of the requirement rather than the "easy way to pass it" and did my best to memorize what I had written.
Several people came past the shelter (where anivair and I first did ritual, so many years ago, to found the Grove). One guy, while pushing his daughters on that squeaky swingset 50 yards away, just sort of stared for a good twenty minutes while I went through the parts over and over again and poured stuff on the fire.
I'm glad I did the work outside, though. I had originally intended to do it at my home altar, but the space there is limiting when it comes to doing group ritual, and I would have had to turn my back fully on the camera to make sacrifice, which would have been an issue for filming. Plus, I wanted to make an offering to a "real" fire, one that would respond well to offerings.
I began the work with a prayer to Inspiration (which I also recorded) and ended with thanks to all those I had called (and called again, and again, and again) and to Teutates, who received his own sacrifice of mistletoe.
It was the Nature Spirits invitation, though, that gave me the most grief. It's not an invitation I often do, so I am not as practiced in it as I should be. It's a part I would like to do more often, I think.
Now, on to that last requirement: writing a small-group Beltaine ritual. I have been thinking that this rite will also serve to provide some of that ritual instruction I've been dying to offer out, since I have to write the whole thing and teach people how to do the parts. Something to look forward to!
Current Location: Southeast of Disorder
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: "Pacing the Cage", -JB
Don't worry: I'll submit it as soon as you review my Special Occasion Rituals paper, which is patiently awaiting your stamp of approval or rejection at http://sptracker.adf.org/